


Someone I Admire

by HayesPeters



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - Childhood Friends, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, Friends to Lovers, Mild Angst, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-19
Updated: 2016-10-11
Packaged: 2018-08-16 02:05:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 33,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8082406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HayesPeters/pseuds/HayesPeters
Summary: It all begins in Small Town, USA, and life isn't necessarily that much simpler when you're young.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know exactly how it happened, but I've written 12k words for this over the past 3 days, so I might as well see it through.
> 
> This is an AU, and with it, the usual warnings for some OOCness apply. I have no idea how long it's going to be, but I can tell you that it starts in 1991, so y'all better get ready for a couple of blasts from the past.

They meet because of their mothers. Piper's mom has made a new friend in the new town they've moved to, and Piper goes with her when they first visit because Anna – her mom's friend – has three kids; two little boys, and a girl around Piper's age.

It's weird driving through a new town, even if it is a small one. It's also kind of exciting, though, so Piper watches the low houses and the side roads pass by; the grocery store and the bakery and the gas station, and then the brief expanse of a wide, open field between two thick stretches of trees just across the road they turn down.

The road is a cul-de-sac with a total of six houses, and Piper's mom pulls into the driveway of the second one on the left; the white one with the deep blue trim, with a garden that's green and flowery for summer and wraps all the way around the house. There's a lady coming out to meet them, too; shorter than Piper's mom, slim and blonde with a just a hint of fire in her hair, and with a little boy on one arm who watches them curiously over his pacifier.

Piper smiles and shakes hands and says a polite hello because the lady seems nice, but she's also glad to be told to go through the house and into the back yard via the porch door while her mom talks to Anna.

Grown-up conversations are boring.

The backyard is to her right when she steps off the porch, and has a little corner of grass and sunlight sectioned off by three huge trees; two pines, and one with small, green leaves. There's also a long stretch of bare dirt here where the grass has been worn down, and Piper guesses that's because there's a thick rope with several knots and a big loop at the end hanging from the leafy tree.

She hasn't seen that before outside of a huge playground, so she walks over to it and folds her hand around it – it's thick enough that her fingers only barely overlap – and pulls it a little because she's curious.

Then she looks up, and almost yells in fright when someone looks back.

“Hi.” The someone is a girl, so probably the one her mom wanted her to play with. She's laying on the thick branch the rope is tied around; on her stomach with her legs wrapped loosely around the branch and an open comic book hanging from one hand, and has long, tangled-looking hair so bleached from the sun that it's almost white.

Piper thinks that she's never seen eyes so blue, and probably stares for a few seconds because her and her mom have black hair and green eyes and she's also never met someone in a tree before. “Hi.”

“Mom said there were people coming over,” the girl tells her, and pushes herself to a seat on the branch that leaves her sneaker-clad feet dangling in mid-air. “Are you one of them?”

“Yes.” Piper watches the girl nod and swing her legs. “Isn't that scary?"

“No?” The answer comes in a curious tone and with a little frown; like the girl doesn't understand why she asks. “Wanna come up?”

The only way she can see of doing that is the rope, and... “I don't know how to climb that,” she admits.

“I'll show you,” is the answer; the comic now being folded up and shoved into the back pocket of the girl's light blue jeans, and she don't seem to worry about the scuffs added to either those or her dark blue t-shirt when she shimmies from the branch and onto the rope, and then climbs down it like she's done it a thousand times.

Wow.

“Hi,” Piper says again, and sticks out a hand when the girl lands on the ground with a thump and a little cloud of dust flying out from her sneakers. “I'm Piper.”

“I'm Liza,” is the reply, with a smile that looks a little practiced and the brief weight of a dirt-streaked hand in her own. “Or Elizabeth, but mom and dad only use that when I've done something bad.”

Piper thinks that Liza seems way too proper a name; it sounds like poofy dresses and boring music, and not like summer sunshine and the smell of dry soil.

“Can I call you Blue?” she asks before she thinks, and feels her face get hot when the girl blinks. “I mean... you have blue eyes and your house has blue trim and you're wearing blue clothes, too, right?”

The girl cocks her head, shrugs one shoulder, and smiles in a way that's small, but looks more natural. “Sure. If you want.”

It's July of 1991. Piper is 7 and Blue is 8, and while it takes several more visits for her to learn to climb the rope, Blue is super-cool and patient and a really good teacher who doesn't mind explaining or showing something ten times if she has to.

 


	2. Chapter 2

The small town only has one school, so it's hardly surprising that when Piper gets enrolled, it's into the same one as Blue. It's not the same class since Blue is older, but it's nice to know that she at least won't be all on her own. Starting school in a completely new place is still a scary thought, though, and she admits as much during the last sleepover they have before the summer ends.

“Why are you scared?” Blue asks; quietly, since it's dark outside and her oldest, little brother is sleeping in the next room.

“I don't know anyone.”

“You know me,” Blue says, and while Piper can't exactly _see_ her – more an outline of her face, which becomes a profile when Blue turns onto her side to face her – they're sharing Blue's bed and she's aware of the weight of her body under the other set of covers. “I'll be there, too.”

“Not in the same class,” Piper says, and though she tries not to sound sad about that, she guesses from the hesitant curl of Blue's hand over her shoulder that she probably fails.

“You'll be fine,” comes the promise, along with a little pat and what sounds like a half-grin. “I bet you'll make ten new friends on the first day alone and forget all about me.”

That makes Piper angry, but it's a weird, low kind of angry that makes her eyes sting; makes her scowl at Blue's outline and lift up and move closer, until Blue goes completely still and doesn't even _breathe_ while Piper wraps a firm arm around her and hugs her as best she can given their positioning.

“I am _not_ going to forget you,” she grumbles into Blue's shoulder; soft cotton and sunlight and freshly cut grass. “Ever. You're my best friend.”

It takes a second but Blue exhales, and then there's an arm curling around Piper's back in return. “You're mine, too.”

\---•♥•---

Blue is right, it turns out. Or... half right, because while Piper _does_ in fact make lots of new friends very easily, she definitely doesn't forget about Blue. They live on opposite sides of the small town so while they can't walk all the way to school together, they meet somewhere in the middle and Blue either pulls her bike for the last stretch or lets Piper sit on the back if they're in a hurry.

“Why don't you have your own?” Blue asks when they've been walking together for about a month, and Piper watches her in the early sunlight and the faint mist, and thinks that it's still odd to see her in clothes that aren't stained from the outdoors and with her hair combed and braided instead of loose and wild around her head. “Bike, I mean.”

“I don't know how to ride one yet,” Piper admits, and hoists her backpack up a little higher on her shoulders. “Mom doesn't really have a lot of time to teach me.”

“Aha,” Blue says, and then goes sort of quiet for the rest of the walk.

Piper forgets the conversation entirely as the day goes on; doing her best in classes and spending recesses playing with her classmates outside like she has every day so far. She still hasn't managed to spot Blue during those times, but figures that maybe the older kids just go somewhere else. It'd probably be a little weird for a big kid like Blue to spend her recesses playing with someone younger than her, anyway.

Blue is always waiting for her outside the school gates when day ends, though, so Piper can live with not seeing her all that much _in_ side them. She also likes that Blue is often doing something else while she waits – usually reading – because that means that Piper gets a moment or two to just watch her as she approaches; to see her hair a little more mussed as it usually is at the end of the day, and slowly grow used to this more put-together version of the best friend she usually knows as mud-streaked and scuff-kneed.

“Why do you play with her?” one of her classmates asks today, and Piper isn't sure why, but there's something about the emphasis on 'her' that she doesn't like.

“What?” She frowns first at her classmate and then in Blue's direction; studying how she's leaned back against a lamp post with a book on her knees and seems peacefully unaware of the bigger or smaller groups passing by. “Why wouldn't I?"

“Because she's so _weird,”_ is the scrunch-nosed answer. “My brother says she never plays with anyone or even talks to anyone but the teachers.”

“She talks to me,” Piper defends, and feels an odd sort of heat in the center of her chest. “She plays with me, too.”

Her classmate giggles, but the sound isn't a nice one. “Wow. I bet all she does is read to you, or wants to act out those stupid novels.”

“Hey!” The heat in her chest is flaring into a burn. “If you can't say anything nice, shut up. She's my _friend.”_

“Fine; go play with your weirdo friend, then.” Her classmate rolls her eyes and walks off, and Piper has to work hard to suppress the urge to throw something after her.

\---•♥•---

It takes some time and a lot of thinking, but by the fall break, Piper has figured out that she's probably the only one in her year and a few above who _doesn't_ think that Blue is weird, and she really doesn't get _why_. Blue is literally the best friend she's ever had; kind and smart and a real out-of-nowhere type funny who can have Piper laughing like a loon in three words or less. She's sweet and the most patient person ever, to the point where she even manages to teach Piper how to ride a bike; all over a series of long afternoons on empty dirt roads at the edge of town.

And okay, there _are_ ways in which she knows that Blue is different from the other kids. For one, she talks like a full-blown adult if Piper really gets her going on a subject she's interested in, and she prefers to spend recess in the classroom with a book. Piper also knows from a curious peek into her school books that while Blue is a year older than her, she's actually two years older in terms of school because she's just that smart.

 _So what?_ That's no reason for other kids to call her weird, and Piper says as much to her mother over dinner one night because she really doesn't understand why it concerns anyone other than Blue.

“I think Liza's just shy, honey,” her mother says, and strokes Piper's hair as they clear the table. “She'll grow out of it. It's normal for people who are very book-smart to be worse at making friends.”

Piper sighs very quietly, but doesn't say anything because there's no point in trying to argue with grownups; the best she can ever get out of attempting to get them to see reason is a _you'll understand when you're older,_ which is especially irritating when the absolute _last_ thing Blue is, is 'shy'. Even the very first time they _met_ , Blue wasn't shy; she clearly just needed time to get _used_ to Piper - like she was a new set of shoes that shaped to her feet over the summer – and that isn't something she really has the chance to do with others because school is way too busy.

So Piper tries to help with that when school starts back up. She starts going to Blue's classroom during recess and talking her into coming outside, but while Blue always agrees, she doesn't seem happy to be in the thick of the action. Even if the game played is one that Piper _knows_ Blue could kick everyone's butts at, she'll take part for the first round and then sort of quietly withdraw to the sidelines.

“Why don't you like playing during recess?” Piper asks, on a Friday afternoon where there's the faintest hint of frost in the air and Blue's cheeks and nose are pink from the cold as they walk home.

“It's too loud,” Blue answers. “It's like... I try to listen to every voice and I can't, so I have to sort of move back so I can't _hear_ all the voices.” She glances over at Piper, and shrugs. “I do better with fewer people.”

“Like...” Piper frowns, and tries to think of something similar. “... having two songs or more playing at the same time, and not being able to just focus on one?”

Blue nods. “Something like that.”

“Okay.” Piper nods, too, and then gives her best friend a little nudge. “As long as my song is always the loudest one.”

A snicker, and then there's a coat-covered arm curling around Piper's shoulders until their backpacks bump together. “Always.”

It's November of 1991. Blue is almost 9 and Piper turns 8 next spring, and they're very different people and that's _okay_.

 


	3. Chapter 3

Blue keeps her promise, and in return, Piper stops trying to coax her into situations where she isn't comfortable. She'll still ask Blue if she wants to come outside to play during recess, but she also learns to recognize the half-second of hesitation that means that Blue really isn't in the mood. On those days, she instead splits her time during breaks; spending half or a little less with her classmates, and half or a little more alone with Blue.

She learns a lot from those breaks as well as from the minutes they spend walking to and from school every day, and from the afternoons, evenings or even entire weekends spent together, because now that she knows to _look_ for the things that make Blue seem weird to others, they're a lot easier to spot.

Compared to Piper's classmates and other friends, Blue is definitely quieter. She's slower to smile or laugh, and tends to do so in smaller, more understated ways when she does. She doesn't reach out to touch others physically unless it's someone she knows very well, and will stiffen when touched herself, especially if it catches her by surprise. She's a ridiculously quick study at pretty much anything and will be ready to turn the page in a book by the time Piper has read about a third of it, and sometimes she'll sink so far into her own head that they can walk all the way back to Blue's house or Piper's, and she won't say a word the entire way or even realize that they've been going there until they arrive.

The other kids think it's weird. Piper thinks it's awesome, and doesn't change her mind even as months become years and Blue is bumped ahead again, which means that she'll be entering junior high when Piper starts fourth grade.

She's just glad that the secondary school buildings are right across the street.

\---•♥•---

It's weird to not have Blue as close by anymore during school days. It's doable, sure - it's not like she's gone off to Timbuktu – but the habit of heading for a classroom on this side of the road is one that it'll probably take her a while to completely break free of. She saw Blue off at the junior high building just this morning, and she _still_ starts walking to her old classroom at the first sound of the bell.

At least it's only a minor delay, and when she's gotten to the right area, Blue is sitting on the bike racks where Piper said goodbye to her just a few hours back.

Piper watches her swing her legs, and thinks that aside from Blue not being in a tree and now being a good bit taller, the scene reminds her a lot of the day they met.

“Hey.” She jogs across the empty, one-lane road, and smiles when Blue does.

“Hey.” Blue's smile becomes a grin when Piper reaches her. “Is summer vacation all it takes for you to forget to look both ways before you cross the road?”

Piper smacks her in the shoulder for that, and Blue laughs. “Shut up,” she grumbles. “No cars ever come here except when classes are about to start or end for the day.”

“True.” Blue's heels thump against the metal bike rack with a hollow sort of ringing.

The sound is a little odd, but very pretty, Piper thinks. Kind of like Blue. “So how's junior high treating you, Miss Advanced Placement?”

Blue rolls her eyes at that. “It's _school,”_ she says, deadpan, and then shrugs. “Different people, different classes.... It's okay, but still kinda boring.” Her mouth pulls into a smirk. “I'll live. Have you seen the new sheriff in town, yet?”

Piper smiles because she knows what Blue means. Her oldest brother – Jacob – has just started kindergarten classes in a small wing attached to the primary school, and has had a real thing for cowboys over the summer. “Not yet,” she admits. “Wanna go say hi?”

Surprisingly, Blue shakes her head. “No. Or... _yes_ , but not now.” Her heels thump against the bike rack again. “Dad says it's probably best to give him a few weeks to get used to everything. I'm so familiar that me showing up can risk him focusing on waiting for me, instead of getting to know his classmates.”

That sounds a lot like Peter, alright, and Piper can kind of follow his logic, which he's always been very good at explaining. Blue's brothers _adore_ her, and the adoration is clearly mutual based on how often Blue plays living monkey-bars while Jacob and Michael climb all over her.

“Okay.” She nods, and sticks her hands into her pockets. “So what _do_ you wanna do?”

Blue hums in thought, and then catches a fold of Piper's sleeve and tugs until they're sitting next to each other. “Tell me about your first day back.”

It's August of 1994. Piper is 10 and Blue is 11, and they'll meet in the middle for as long as they have to.

 


	4. Chapter 4

Blue's dad is home a lot less this year because he's started traveling for his company. Blue's mom works too, so now Blue and her brothers have a kind of nanny; a college student named Sarah who takes evening classes and stays at Blue's house from the time she and Jacob go to school and until Blue's mom comes home from work.

Piper likes Sarah. She's tall and has freckles like Piper, with curly, red hair and a nice smile. She's also smart and good at dealing with Jacob and Michael when they're yelling, and will make snacks for all four of them when Piper comes over after school; something that happens more often than not because Piper's mom also has to work, but doesn't really have the money to hire someone.

The main reason Piper likes Sarah, though, is because Sarah likes Blue. She doesn't think that Blue is 'weird', and doesn't get that look on her face that others sometimes do when Blue says or does something that others probably wouldn't say or do.

Sarah, Piper learns one day, is studying something called Child Development Psychology. When Blue's mom comes home, the two of them will sit in the kitchen for a bit and talk over a cup of coffee before Sarah leaves, and Piper and Blue will play either alone or with her brothers while the grownups talk. Today, they're playing alone because Jacob and Michael are playing alone, and Blue is showing her how to use the fancy, new computer in her dad's office because it's pouring rain outside.

It's pretty cool how Blue actually knows how to make sense of it, so Piper listens and learns and wonders how in the world her best friend remembers all this. The pinball game, at least, she can keep up with, and they take turns playing while the sound – MIDI-files, Blue says – plays tinnily through the small speakers. When it's Blue's turn again, Piper pokes her shoulder and tells her that she's thirsty, though what she hears when she walks down the hall is enough to make her stop before she reaches the door to the kitchen.

“But not disruptive?” Sarah is saying.

“God, no.” That's Blue's mom, Anna. “She just loses focus and gets lost in a book instead of paying attention in class, and while her teachers are trying their best, it's clear that she's bored.” There's a little pause, and the sound of a cup being set down. “We thought that maybe moving her ahead another year would help and it _has_ to some extent, but intellectually, she should be halfway through high school by now.”

It sounds like Sarah is sucking in air through her teeth. “I agree, but I'm not sure jumping her that far is a good idea.”

“No.” Blue's mom laughs, but the sound is low and kind of sad. “Socially, she's _behind_ by several years. Trying to keep up with her intelligence means that she's closing herself off from her classmates, because she doesn't know how to interact with them. The only child her own age that she enjoys being around is Piper.”

“No kidding,” Sarah chuckles. “Those two are practically attached at the hip.”

“And thank God for that. I'd hate to think what my little girl's life would be like if Piper wasn't a part of it.”

“I doubt that's something to worry about,” Sarah says. “Piper's Blue hung the moon; end of story.”

“Indeed.” Blue's mom is the one chuckling this time. “I just hope it's enough.”

“It is.” Sarah's voice is low and reassuring. “She'll learn to relate to others _because_ of Piper. It just takes time.”

“I hope so.” Blue's mom sighs. “We have other options – schools that cater specifically to her needs – but they're few and far between, and we'd rather not disrupt the lives of her or the boys any more than we have to.”

“No; I wouldn't recommend that,” Sarah agrees. “Where is the nearest one?”

“Two states over,” Blue's mom says, and Piper's stomach goes very cold very fast. “Peter and I would really like to avoid moving our family that far; _especially_ because of Piper and Liza.”

Piper isn't thirsty anymore, but she does think hard about what she heard as she walks back to the office. She knew that Blue is smart, but not that she was _high school_ smart, and she knew that Blue isn't good at making friends, but not that she was _that_ bad at it. She also didn't know that Blue's parents are hoping that Piper will help teach her somehow, but she thinks that with how much Blue has taught her, that she can at least try. Sure, she still has to figure out _how,_ but keeping Blue close by instead of having her move far away is very good incentive.

“I thought you were thirsty?” Blue says when she looks up from the computer screen; her chin in one hand and a questioning look on her face.

“I changed my mind.” Piper hops into the chair while Blue scoots over so they can sit next to each other between the armrests. It's a tight fit already and is probably only going to get more so as they grow bigger, but for now, Piper curls an arm around her best friend's back and focuses on the warmth of Blue's body all the way along her own side.

No way is she giving this up if she can help it.

“It's your turn,” Blue tells her, and pushes the mouse over a little.

“You can have another go,” Piper decides, and sticks her tongue out at the curious look. “You'll need it; I'm gonna kick your butt next round.”

“You wish,” Blue snorts, and Piper grins and leans her head against Blue's shoulder.

\---•♥•---

It actually takes a couple of months before Blue brings up the idea of visiting Jacob's class during recess, but in spite of the chill in the air, Piper is only happy to agree when she does. She has absolutely no problem spending her breaks alone with Blue, but the talk she overheard is still weighing on her mind, and it's a pretty big deal for Blue to suggest socializing on her own; even if it is with a group of 6-year olds. She's seeing less of Blue in the afternoons and evenings as it is because her parents enrolled her in a taekwando class in the big city, so no way is she going to say no to something that Blue can bring her along for.

Piper isn't sure exactly where the idea of martial arts came from, but she guesses it has something to do with the balance beam that Blue's uncles set up in the back yard last summer. Maybe working on her balance is something that helps Blue learn to focus, and even if it isn't, both that and the classes seem to be helping her deal with the fact that she's grown over half a foot in half a year because before either, Blue would sometimes seem to forget how long her limbs are.

That lunch break, Piper waits by the doors to the kindergarten wing instead of crossing the road to the secondary school buildings, and waves when Blue comes jogging up the wide hallway towards her. Her hair, Piper notes, is getting almost cartoonishly long, and the braid that she usually wears it in is almost reaching her butt. Her bangs, too, are getting too long, and if her hair wasn't that thick and didn't have that natural, little wave to it, it'd be covering her eyes at this point.

That, Piper thinks, would be a crying shame, because Blue has the prettiest eyes ever.

“You need a haircut,” she therefore tells her when Blue skids to a stop on the linoleum floor, and smirks when Blue sticks out her tongue.

“Stop channeling my mom,” Blue scolds. “It's weird.”

Piper snickers, and reaches up – _way_ up - to brush those bangs back. “You still need a haircut, scruffy.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Blue rolls her eyes, but catches Piper's hand and doesn't let it go as they swap the primary school hall for the the one leading to the kindergarten classes. “I'm getting one next week.”

“Ah.” Piper swings their arms a little, and decides for anything but the first time that she likes how easily Blue reaches out to her. “Any plans for it?”

“No?” Blue gives her an odd look. “It's just hair. If I don't like it, it'll grow back.”

That's a very Blue thing to say, and Piper honestly likes it a lot better than the fretting the girls in her class will do over the same subject; poring over magazines and being absolutely gutted if what they end up with isn't exactly what they wanted. Some, she knows, will even get angry if their parents don't take them to real salons, while Blue has always gotten her hair cut by a friend of her mother's and is perfectly happy with that. It's not that her parents can't afford to take Blue or her brothers to a real salon, Piper knows, but more of a matter of keeping them comfortable around people and places that they know.

The end result is that Blue is very unconcerned with physical appearances, and maybe that's why she's one of the prettiest girls in the school; at least to Piper.

The kindergarten playground is large and sunlit and _loud_ , with squealing, yelling little bodies zipping to and fro, and Piper doesn't pull when Blue sort of stops in the doorway for a second, because she knows that this abrupt of a change in noise level is something that her best friend needs a moment to get used to. It's taking less time now than it did a few years ago, and Blue starts moving again on her own soon enough; forward, until they're standing at the edge of the playground and she can see Blue scan the dozens of little kids in search of Jacob.

Then Blue _whistles_ in a way that Piper didn't know she'd learned how to, and she has to let go of the hand in her hold to instead cover her her ears.

“Sorry,” Blue mutters, a little sheepishly. “Shoulda warned you first.”

“Please do that next time,” Piper groans. “I think my teeth are ringing.”

Blue snickers and Piper sends her a half-hearted glare in response, but Blue doesn't notice because there's a small body zooming across the grass to wrap itself around her legs.

“Liza!” Jacob crows, and grabs his sister's hand while he hops excitedly up and down. “You came, you came!”

“Duh!” Blue hoists him up, and Piper smiles because the skin around her eyes are softening the way that it only ever does for Jacob or Michael. “I said that I would this morning, right?”

“Yes!”

“And I always keep my promises, right?”

“Yes!” Jacob wraps his arms tightly around his sister's neck and only then seems to notice Piper, who he grins at from over Blue's shoulder. “Hi, Piper!”

Piper grins right back. “Hey, Jakey.” She reaches out to ruffle his hair, and has to work back a snicker at the scowl that earns her. Jacob is definitely the odd one out among the three siblings in terms of coloring; having Peter's dark brown hair and brown eyes while Blue and Michael have Anna's much fairer features. The smile, however, is a mirror image of itself in all three of them, and the love affair between Blue and her brothers is a wonderful thing to watch.

“Are you here to play with us?” Jacob asks; all wide, hopeful eyes and still-chubby hands that grab onto the sides of his sister's face.

“Yup.” Blue grins when her brother shouts in triumph, and sets him back on his own feet before dropping to a crouch in front of him. “And I have an idea. How about we show all your friends here--” She points at the rest of the playground, from where some are watching curiously and others haven't noticed them at all. “-- how to swing like we do at home?”

“Yes!” Jacob cheers, and Piper takes a few steps back because while there _is_ a large swing set, she knows that that isn't the kind of swinging Blue means.

Instead, it's the kind where Jacob gets a secure grip on his sister's wrists while Blue holds on tight to his forearms; the kind where the two siblings then exchange a glance and a set of matching grins before Blue starts turning in place; faster and faster until Jacob's feet leave the ground and he's practically flying. It only stops when Blue slows, and while _she_ staggers for a few steps, Jacob is so dizzy that all he can do is wobble off a couple of feet and collapse in a laughing, little pile on the ground.

They definitely have the attention of the rest of the playground now, and Blue only seems to realize that when she looks up. It startles her, Piper can tell, to be under the regard of that many sets of eyes, but she seems to deal with it, and then cocks her head and smiles. “Who else wants a turn?”

That would be _everyone,_ and Piper has to bite the inside of her cheek _hard_ to keep from laughing because Blue is surrounded by excited faces and high voices in the blink of an eye, and honestly looks a little alarmed.

“Uh, Piper?” Blue's face is somewhere between amused and nervous and pleading when she turns. “I'm gonna need another set of hands.”

Piper giggles into her own hand, but walks over because what else would she do?

It's December of 1994. Blue is almost 12 and Piper will be 11 in a few months, and life is pretty much perfect.

 


	5. Chapter 5

Blue's birthday is in the first half of January; close to both Christmas and New Years. Piper remembers asking her - years ago – if that wasn't annoying, and Blue just shrugged and said that she wouldn't know since she's never tried anything else.

That makes sense, and it's not like Blue's birthday falls by the wayside in spite of the holidays, anyway. There's always a small celebration on the closest Saturday, and this year, the guests include a few people outside of Blue's family and Piper herself because the scout troop their parents signed them both up for seems to be working in getting Blue a little better at making friends.

The addition is Maria, who is 11 years old, and who talks with her hands because she can't hear. Maria's mom Betty is there too, and while she can hear and talk with her voice, she uses her hands to translate what others are saying so Maria can understand it if people aren't looking at her. Piper sits right right across from Maria and doesn't know sign language very well, but Maria can read lips so as long as either Betty or Blue – who's picking the language up as lightning fast as she does anything else – is there to translate what Maria says, they can talk just fine.

Blue's grandparents and aunts and uncles are here too, and it's always a little staggering to suddenly have so many people and so much noise in a home that usually houses 6 people at most. Blue is actually the one that seems the least affected, but Piper guesses that it's because these are people she knows. She doesn't flinch when she's hugged and kissed by Angelique and Olivier Delaurent (her mother's parents) or James and Margaret Fitzroy (her father's parents), and while both sets come from way out of town, Piper has met them often enough that she hugs them too and isn't surprised to hear Blue slip into French when she talks to the Delaurents.

It's a little breathtaking sometimes to realize that Blue is just over a year older than Piper, because she speaks _two languages_ and is picking up a _third_ and is _so_ smart that she's years ahead of even her current, advanced placement, and sometimes Piper honestly wonders what someone that amazing even keeps her around for. Piper's grades are excellent, sure, and she's turning out to be one heck of a tennis player and swimmer both, but she's pretty sure that there isn't a person on the planet who's even remotely close to Blue's level of awesomeness.

“ _Attend, Grandmere.”_ There's a few steps, and then Blue is leaning on the table next to Piper and studying her closely. “You okay?”

Maybe, Piper thinks, Blue keeps her around because she's the only one so important that Blue will know the second she feels a little overwhelmed.

That helps a lot. “Yeah,” Piper tells her, and smiles. “It's just a little loud.”

“Tell me about it,” Blue mutters; straightening up enough that she can use her hands to translate for Maria. “Be glad there's no wine on the table; that's when they get _really_ loud.”

Maria hides a quiet laugh behind one hand, and Piper grins too; making the sign for 'adults' and rolling her eyes. “You seem okay, though,” she then says to Blue, and while her signing is a lot slower and often not there at all, she's getting better at it.

“I'm used to it,” is Blue's wry answer. “But I get it, so... wanna go outside?” she asks, and glances to Maria in what Piper guesses is an attempt to ensure that she knows the invitation extends to her. “Shame to waste all that fresh snow, right?”

Maria narrows her eyes, and while Piper isn't far enough along to understand what she signs in response, it's something that makes Blue laugh.

“No sneak attacks,” her best friend translates; one hand coming up in a salute while the other catches Piper's own. “As you wish.”

\---•♥•---

It's cruel, but something about Blue becoming a bigger, social fixture in the small town only seems to make her _more_ of an outcast; or at least that's how it feels to Piper, who has to yell at the kids in her year and over more and more often. Some of them are part of the same scout troop as her and Blue, and she guesses that maybe that's why the talking is picking up; because they're now seeing Blue's 'weirdness' on a regular basis, and tells their friends about it as something to giggle about during recess.

Piper doesn't _get it_. How on earth is it such a big deal that Blue's a little different from everyone else? She's _so_ smart and _so_ sweet and literally the coolest person ever in Piper's eyes, but all the other kids can talk about is how she sometimes says things that make no sense (only they _do_ if you know her), and how she'll shy away from being touched or isn't even able to look most people in the eye.

It isn't fair, and so Piper sets out to turn that around. She _tries_ to make them understand; explains like her mom did that Blue's very good at books but not as good at people, and that she'll get better at it if people just have a little _patience_ with her and let her get _used_ to them, like Piper and Maria did. When that doesn't work, she starts arguing that maybe the people talking should find something more to do with their apparently non-existent lives than giggling about others behind their backs.

She doesn't tell Blue, but she _does_ take care to meet her after school as soon as possible, so she can get her away before any of the kids who talk can see her and start talking _right next to her_. Blue is realizing that she's different other than being smart and bored in class, but she's learning and she's proud of it and she _should be_ , and Piper just wants her to not get knocked off stride by some stupid kids who don't know when to shut their stupid faces.

Maybe it isn't that surprising that Piper's defense of Blue ends up with _her_ being the target of the teasing. That's fine, though; she can deal with that, and she'd rather they tease her than Blue because Piper _knows_ how to fight back and she isn't sure that Blue _does_. So she takes it on the chin – whatever that means – and is glad that she can spend her afternoons with Blue and sometimes with Maria, because everyone else _sucks_.

The kindergartners, at least, are different. Going to see them during lunch and playing with Jacob and his friends is a safe place for Blue and Piper both, and it's amazing to watch Blue around them because she is with all of them like she is with Jacob and Michael, and Piper has a feeling that this is helping her learn to deal with people a lot more than the scout troop ever could. These kids are much more straightforward; they don't _care_ that Blue is different – if they even realize that she is – to them she's just Jacob's cool, older sis who comes to play with them and shows them all sorts of awesome tricks.

The ones around Piper's age, though? Well, maybe it isn't that surprising that it actually comes to blows. She doesn't mean for it to, of course; she's just glad that it's Friday and looking forward to leaving, and then she's yanked down the wrong corner and Danny Robinson from grade 6 is standing there with two of his friends and pretty much everyone else is already on their way out the front doors. It's not an ideal situation and Piper knows that, but she straightens her shoulders and gives back as good as she gets when Danny starts yelling at her, and sets herself like Blue showed her so that she doesn't fall over when she's shoved.

She does fall over when two of them shove her at the same time, but she growls and gets right back up because _no way_ is she backing down to a group of idiots without a fight. So someone slaps and then someone throws a punch and someone else kicks, and it's basically a whole lot of confusion and yelling and hair-pulling that's--

“HEY!” The yell reminds Piper mostly of a bark from a large dog; loud and deep and _dangerous_ , and it echoes down the empty hallway and makes them all separate because no one wants trouble from a teacher.

It's not a teacher, though. It's Blue, and while it might be because Piper hasn't seen her _here_ for so long, it's Blue in a way that's very different from normal. It's Blue with her steps long and fast and purposeful; with her fingers clenching and unclenching at her sides. It's Blue with her head tilted forward and her mouth pressed into a thin line and her eyes almost _sparking_ in the passing beams of sunlight from the windows, and it's Blue at her utmost _furious_ and Piper has never seen that before.

“You wanna pick a fight?” Blue says when she stops so close to Danny that their toes are touching, and her voice is low and soft and almost vibrating with how angry she is. “Pick one with me.”

Danny does. Or he _tries_ , at any rate, but Blue catches his hand at the first punch he throws and then turns and _twists_ until she's got Danny's arm wrenched up behind his back and can simply shove him forward. He trips and falls, and his friends only make a token effort that earn them each the _smack_ of the flat of Blue's palm against their shoulders – not their faces – and it takes maybe ten seconds before they're running away.

Danny is barely on his hands and knees it all happens so fast, and Blue breathes very hard through her nose as she hauls him upright by the scruff of his neck; then spins him around, shoves him up against a wall and curls her fingers tight in the front of his shirt.

“Don't. _Fucking_. Touch her,” she whispers, and keeps those steely eyes trained on Danny's for several seconds. “Got that?”

He gets it, and Blue seems to sort of slump when he's out of sight; her shoulders drooping and her eyes closing and her arms curling around herself as she leans back against the wall and just breathes.

“Wow, Blue,” Piper mutters, and approaches when a single eye pops open to regard her. “That was pretty badass.”

Blue huffs around a little smile. “Don't say that word around my mom; she'll fine you a dime. A dollar for the one I used.” Piper's closer now, and doesn't pull back when Blue's hand comes up to carefully hold her chin and turn her head this way and than in the fading sunlight. “You okay?”

“Are you kidding?” Piper grins and curls a hand around Blue's wrist, but it's more to just have the contact. “I just watched my best friend pretty much wipe the floor with _Danny Robinson._ That's was the coolest thing ever!”

“Piper...” Blue _is_ smiling, but it's crooked and wry and looks a little exasperated. “That was a schoolyard brawl with probably no good reason behind it and no good outcome. I'm just glad I remembered enough to break it up without anyone getting hurt.”

She isn't entirely sure that she can follow Blue's logic this time, and doesn't really like the feeling. “You fought them, though,” she points out, a little confused. “You hit them.”

“Yes.” Blue nods, and now looks very serious. “But I didn't _injure_ them. I did enough to show that I _could,_ and ran them off. The best outcome of any fight is to finish it without hurting anyone.”

Something about the last sentence sounds less like Blue, and more like Blue repeating what she's been told by someone else. And _that_ makes a few pieces click into place. “Your instructor tell you that?”

“Sabum Nim,” Blue nods, and runs her fingers carefully through Piper's hair. “And yes. He says that he isn't teaching us to fight, but to _defend,_ and that we should only fight outside the mat when we're defending ourselves or someone else.”

“Huh.” Piper considers that, and idly decides that she likes the feeling of Blue's fingers scratching gently at the back of her head; even if it makes her stomach feel funny. “That's what you did,” she then notes. “You defended me.”

“Mmhm.” Blue nods, and now there's a smile pulling at the corner of her mouth. “And I'm pretty sure that _you_ were also defending _me.”_ Pause. “Again.”

Ermph. So maybe Blue does know that people are talking, Piper figures. That really shouldn't surprise her, since there doesn't seem to be a whole lot that Blue _doesn't_ know. The fact that she knows that Piper's been talking back, though, is... a little embarrassing, for some reason; one that probably has something to do with the quiet gratitude in those eyes.

She still can't figure out what to say to it, though. “Um...”

“That means yes,” Blue translates, with a little twinkle in her eyes that makes Piper's cheeks feel hot. “Thank you. Hey--” Her fingers slip under Piper's chin and bring her head back up when it ducks. “-- I mean it. Okay? I appreciate it, Piper, but you really don't have to. It is _not_ worth you getting hurt over,” Blue intones very quietly. “Nothing is. They're just words. I don't mind.”

“Well, I _do,”_ Piper returns firmly, and now pulls her into a hug that's maybe a little stiff at first because Blue's still learning, but soon becomes easy and relaxed and close. It doesn't even feel _that_ weird to have the top of her head come barely to Blue's shoulder, so Piper closes her eyes and feels Blue's arms relax against her back. “I just wish that everyone else could figure out how awesome you are.”

Blue chuckles just by her ear, and then Piper goes bright red when there's a kiss to her temple. “As long as you and the boys know, that's all I care about.”

It's February of 1995. Blue is 12 and Piper very close to 11, and she's starting to figure out what a crush feels like.

 


	6. Chapter 6

Piper is getting steadily better at both tennis and swimming, to the point where she now has the occasional match or meet to go to. She isn't _winning_ any of them yet, but her coaches are working her hard and it feels like she's getting closer to just that with every passing week. It feels like accomplishment, which she likes, but with Blue spending more time on TKD and going to matches of her own, it also feels vaguely like a plot. They still share the last or first leg to and from school together, and they still spend their lunch breaks with Jacob's class. They also still spend time together after school, but Blue trains three times a week and Piper swims or plays tennis at least twice a week for each, so they have a max of one free afternoon total and half a weekend at most, since that's when most of their meets and matches are; often in opposing towns.

Piper likes tennis and swimming both, and it's clear that Blue enjoys taekwondo and that it's doing a lot for her; both in terms of getting used to physical contact and other things. But it's weird to suddenly not spend all their time in each other's back pockets anymore.

“Mom?” she asks; one Saturday morning when they're driving two towns over for a swimming meet. “Is this whole deal with me and Blue doing different sports a planned thing?”

Her mother glances at her from the corner of her eye, and smiles a little. “You're too smart for your own good, kiddo; you know that?”

That, Piper knows, means yes. “Why?” she wonders, because _knowing_ doesn't mean that she _understands_ , and honestly, her first instinct at finding out that she and Blue are being separated _on purpose_ is to get angry. "We haven't done anything wrong!"

"I know, honey; I know," her mother shushes gently. "But both of you are getting old enough that you need to spend time with other people, too."

"That's stupid," Piper grumbles, and falls hard back in the passenger seat. "Why is it fine for us for be together all the time when we were kids, but not now that we're growing up?"

"I'm not going to be able to get away with a 'you'll understand when you're older', am I?"

"Hell no!"

"Language." The stern look makes her subside with a scowl. "Honey, it's great that you and Liza are so close; it really is. But I'm a little worried that you're focusing too much on your friendship with her, and not enough on yourself."

"I thought I was supposed to help her get better at people?"

That makes her mother look over; if only briefly because she _is_ driving. "Now, where did you hear that?"

Oops. Piper folds her hands in her lap, and looks down. "I... might've overheard Mrs. F talking about it."

"Piper Wright!" Piper winces, because _man,_ she hates that 'mom' tone. It always makes her feel like she's let her down, somehow. "You know better than to eavesdrop!"

"Yes, Ma'am. I didn't mean to; honest. I was just going to get a glass of water and heard Mrs. F talking to Sarah."

The car slows while the indicator clicks on and off, and then her mom turns carefully to the left. "And you didn't either leave or announce yourself why?"

Piper curls her toes inside of her outdoor-sneakers, and chews her lower lip. "Because they were talking about how to help Blue not seem so different."

That must be explanation enough, because Piper's mom sighs like she understands. "Oh, honey..." There's a long pause with only the faint hum of the tires against the road. "Piper, Liza _is_ getting better at that; I promise. The two of you playing with her brother's friends and her going into the city for martial arts is really helping her, and it shows."

There's a 'but' coming. Piper can practically taste it.

"But--" Yup. "-- that also means that the two of you don't have to focus quite as hard on each other anymore, and I know it doesn't feel like it, but both me and Liza's parents agree that having you two spend less time together is a good thing."

"You said that," Piper points out, but takes care to keep her voice soft even if her chest is burning. "Why, though?"

Her mom drums her fingers on the steering wheel while they wait at a red light. "Do you remember that potted rose you had in your room last year?"

Piper blinks, because _what?_ "Uh, yeah. The one that turned out to actually be two roses, right?"

"That's the one," her mother agrees. "Remember how the two roses ended up winding around each other?"

She does. "They ended up choking each other," Piper murmurs. "You're worried about me and Blue doing the same?"

"Not exactly." Her mom steers the car into the parking lot of a sports center. "We're worried about the two of you being so focused on each other that you don't get to figure out who you are as individuals. That's not a good way to be in any relationship."

"Why not?"

"Because eventually you and Liza aren't going to have anything to learn about each other," her mom says, and turns off the engine when they've come to a stop in a free parking space. "Remember how exited you are whenever you or her have taught each other something new? What if that never happened again?"

Piper chews on her lip some more, because that _does_ sound pretty sad, even if it’s probably also a long time away.

"So I'd like you to at least try it our way, kiddo." Piper's mother runs her hand over Piper's head. "You can still play; just not as often as you used to. Okay?"

"Yes, Ma'am," Piper sighs, and leans into the arm that curls around her shoulders and the kiss that presses against the top of her head.

"That's my big girl." Her mom smiles, and opens the car door. "Now, how about we go inside and you show me how much faster you've gotten since the last meet?"

\---•♥•---

It sucks to not spend as much time around Blue as she's used to, but on the upside of things, what time they _do_ get together becomes all the sweeter because of it. Every once in a while, Piper and her mom will go to ones of Blue's matches as long as it's close enough by, and while it's supremely unnerving to watch her best friend stand there in a white shirt and pants - _dobok_ , Blue calls it - across from someone who is very much trying to hit her, they always bow and bump gloves when it's over, and when the whole thing is, Blue will even laugh with them.

So it's obviously only pretend-fighting, and Piper knows that. That doesn't really help in the heat of the moment, though.

In return, sometimes Blue and her mom or dad or both will come to one of Piper's tennis matches or swim meets, and one of her favorite memories becomes the hot spring day where she wins a match 6-2, 6-1 - her biggest and quickest win yet - and the final call from the umpire is punctuated by polite clapping and a long, loud whistle that makes her twirl her racket in one hand and grin to herself.

She wasn't _trying_ to show off for Blue, but that's how it worked out and Piper certainly doesn't regret it. It also doesn't hurt that they all go out for ice cream later, or that Blue spends the drive home - where she rides with Piper - trying to learn _that grip you have that turns your arm into a dang batting machine._

It feels like maybe Blue admires Piper as much as Piper admires Blue, and that's honestly pretty awesome.

Blue shows her some of the moves she's learning in TKD as well. Not anything dangerous; more ways to get out of the way of a punch or a kick, and ways to pull herself free if someone is grabbing her. That usually happens in Blue's back yard and ends up with both of them covered in dust and grass stains and laughing until their stomachs hurt.

It's definitely a crush, Piper knows by now, and maybe also a pretty decent case of hero worship. But how could it not be, when her best friend is as awesome as she is?

She doesn't say anything about it, though. It's not like she knows anyone else who has a crush on another girl, so this is probably just a way in which Piper, this time, is a little different.

"Do you really have a crush on Bobby Daniels?" she asks Blue one late, early summer evening; one where Blue's dad has put up a bright green tent in their back yard and Piper and Blue are sleeping out there tonight while Jacob and Michael will tomorrow.

"Nah." Blue shakes her head and smiles and Piper's stomach feels oddly lighter; right there between sleeping bags and flashlights and comic books. "But I said I do because people didn't believe me when I said I wasn't crushing on _anyone_ , and because no one else had a crush on him."

"Ah." Piper chuckles and turns the page. "So no one would start fighting with you over him?"

Blue hums. "That too," she agrees, and shuffles a little in a way that makes her arm and shoulder brush against Piper's. "But I also felt kinda bad that no one had mentioned him, y'know? He's nice." She goes quiet for a few seconds, and then taps the comic in a way that means that Piper can turn the next page when she's ready. "If I _was_ crushing on a guy, it'd probably be him."

"Mm." Piper reads for a few moments longer, and then starts talking before she can think better of it. "You really think girls can only have crushes on guys?"

There's a brief moment of silence, and Piper looks up to see Blue watching her; her eyes an odd, almost glowing, pale green that's probably due to the yellow beam from the flashlight.

"Isn't that how it works?" Blue asks, with a tiny furrow forming between her brows. "Girls and boys?"

"Well, yeah." Piper laughs a little, and hopes that her voice doesn't sound as shaky as her chest feels. "Most of the time, anyway. But there wouldn't be anything wrong with girls crushing on girls or boys crushing on boys, would there?"

"No," Blue says, and gives the wall of the tent a long, thoughtful look. "I guess not. I never really thought about it."

"Eh." Piper shrugs one shoulder and turns the page again. "Like I said, it's probably gonna be boy/girl most of the time, anyway. I just like the thought that boys aren't the only option." She holds her breath and waits, and prays that Blue can't tell that she's doing it.

"Hm." Blue frowns at the wall some more and nods once; like she's made a decision. "You're right," she then says, and smiles. "That is a nice thought."

And something about that easy acceptance makes Piper's crush on Blue both a whole lot worse and a whole lot easier to deal with.

\---•♥•---

Piper is starting to realize a lot of things now that she's growing up. For one, that she likes Blue (that's a big one, or at least it feels like it), and for another - once she learns about different classes in society and understands the concept enough that she can translate the books to the real world - that Blue's parents probably have a lot more money than Piper's mom does.

Blue's dad drives a Mercedes, and her mom has an SUV big enough for her, Blue and her brothers and a few more besides. Blue gets new clothes while Piper wears hand-me-downs, and Blue's parents can hire someone to watch their kids while Piper either goes home from school with friends or uses a key of her own. And, of course, Blue's extended family _flies in from out of state_ whenever there's a gathering of some kind.

She probably didn't realize until now, Piper considers, because those are really the only signs; newer furniture and a nicer TV not withstanding. Blue has chores just like Piper, and gets an allowance the same size. She lives in a house that's no bigger than anyone else's, and earns extra spending money by doing extra chores either at home or for her neighbors.

Piper still feels kind of dumb when she finally figures it out, though, because it really does seem pretty obvious in hindsight.

“Mom?” She glances up from her dinner one night, and waits for her mother to do the same. “Are the Fitzroys rich?”

Her mother takes a second to answer, and gets that look on her face that Piper is learning means 'yes, but I'm not sure if I should tell you'. “Why do you ask?”

That's definitely a yes, Piper decides, and shrugs. “Lots of reasons.”

“Name one, then.”

Piper takes a forkful of food and chews it while she thinks. “Everything that needs power in their house or their garage is newer.”

Her mom just looks at her for a moment, and then smiles. “You really need to start writing at some point, kiddo.”

That's mom-speak for 'well put', Piper knows. So she smiles, but also points a finger at her mother because doing that isn't as big of a deal these days. “That's not an answer.”

“No; I suppose not.” Her mother chews, too, and Piper waits and listens to the low song playing on the radio in the background. “Yes, honey. They are.”

“Like, super rich?”

“Pretty much.” Her mom smiles. “Rich enough that Anna and Peter probably don't _need_ to work.”

Piper thinks about that, and moves her food around her plate while she does. She doesn't get scolded for playing with it, though. “Rich enough to visit Disneyland?”

That makes her mom laugh. “Every day, if they wanted to.”

Wow. Piper blinks as she tries to wrap her head around that one, because that's definitely rich. “So why don't they? And why do they?”

“Why don't they visit Disneyland every day and why do they work if they don't have to?”

“Yeah.”

“Hm. Well...” Her mom takes a moment to chew another bite. “Have you heard the phrase 'the value of a dollar' in school?”

“No.” Piper shakes her head, and then grins. “But I've heard it from you.”

“Smart-aleck.” Her mother's eyes narrow, but Piper can tell that she's only playing. “Peter and Anna work because their parents are rich, too. And their parents taught Peter and Anna – like Peter and Anna are trying to teach Liza and Jacob and Michael – the value of a dollar.”

“What does that mean, though?”

“Let's say I gave you ten dollars right now,” her mom says. “What would you do with it?”

Piper isn't sure that she can follow the change in mental tracks, but her mom always has a point so she goes with it. “Probably buy comic books and candy.”

“You'd spend it on something you want, but don't have,” is the reply, along with a nod. “Now, imagine that you had all the money in the world. Everything you've ever wanted, you can have. Right now.” Her mom stands and picks up her plate, and Piper does the same after shoveling in her last forkful. “Sounds great, right?”

“Mm.”

“So what do you do when you run out of things to want?” The faucet turns on, and the water spatters against the metal sink. “What do you put on your wish list for Christmas or for your birthday?”

“Nothing, I guess.”

“Uh-huh.” Her mom hands over a dish towel, and Piper takes it. “Tell me something, kiddo; what is the fun part of Christmas? Is it just opening presents?”

“No,” Piper decides easily, and hoists herself onto the counter next to the sink. “I mean, that's fun, too, but once it's done, Christmas is kind of over.”

“And that's kind of a sad feeling, isn't it?”

“Yeah.”

“Now think: If you could go out and just buy everything because that's how much money you have, then Christmas is kind of over forever, isn't it?” The first glass is handed over, and Piper takes it with a frown. “You'd never have that excited feeling of _waiting_ for it anymore.”

Piper thinks about that while she dries the glass. “It's the waiting that makes it special, isn't it?”

“You got it, kiddo.” Her mom's hands are in soapy water, but she leans over and kisses Piper's forehead. “And the waiting is how you earn the best parts; how you work for it, in a way. And _that_ is the value of a dollar.”

“Earning the fun things?”

“Earning the fun things.” Her mom smiles as she reaches up and wipes a fingerful of soap bubbles off on Piper's nose. “Either through waiting for them, or through working for the money you need to buy them. They mean more that way.”

It's sort of like how she and Blue are spending less time together, Piper considers as that conversation rattles around her head over the next few days. Less time, but more meaningful because they have to work harder for it. So when Blue tells her that she's going with her parents and brothers to New Orleans for the entire summer to visit her grandparents (Jacob and Michael are both old enough for that kind of trip now, apparently), Piper is sad, but also works extra hard to enjoy what time she does get with her before the school year is over.

Except one day – on one of their rare, free afternoons where it's warm and sunny and they're riding a pair of old mountain-bikes around an empty field – Blue just sort of stops and looks at her.

“Come with us.”

“To New Orleans?” Piper waits, and blinks when Blue nods. “Isn't that really expensive?”

“Yeah.” Blue leans her elbows on her handle bars and spends a few seconds chewing on her own, lower lip. “But my parents would pay for it.”

“Would? Or will?”

That makes Blue smile; small and crooked. “Will. And--” She looks away then; down at her hands, which are locked together with her thumbs twiddling slowly. “-- your mom already said you could.” That familiar voice is low and soft; not _expecting_ , but _hoping_. “If you want to.”

Piper feels a little dizzy, and thinks that it kind of feels like Christmas.

“I want to,” she says, and laughs when _Blue_ hugs _her_ ; sudden enough that they both fall off their bikes and end up in the soft, dry soil; long and solid and close and _easy_ until they're both giggling into each other's shoulders.

It's June of 1995. Piper is 11 and Blue is 12, and this summer is theirs because they've earned it.

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's probably gonna hurt a bit, so my apologies in advance.
> 
> One more chapter for this initial arch, and then we'll do the time-warp.

Visiting New Orleans is an absolute blast, but Piper isn't too surprised since that's par for the course anytime Blue and her are together. They stay with Blue's grandparents in a _huge_ house in a place called the Garden District, and Piper is glad that she's already met the Delaurents several times because that means that some of the usual rules for saying hello can be sort of glossed over. That's a very good thing since she's pretty sure she spends the first hour there staring; first around the house, and then at the backyard that's probably the size of the park back home and full of color and trees and flowers.

Some days, they go into the city; all four kids and one of Blue's grandparents while Blue's parents do other things with whichever grandparent stays home. Grandpere Olivier will show them around the French Quarter or Jackson Square, or take them on rides on the street cars or even on board a massive steam boat down the Mississippi River. Grandmere Angelique takes them to the Audubon Zoo and buys them little pastries called beignets at a small, bakery/café combo where they can sit outside at a table big enough for all of them, or drives them out to watch – and in one case even _sail on_ – the boats that zip back and forth across a lake called Pontchartrain that's bigger than the entire city.

Some days, they spend around the house; playing in the huge yard that has lots of good hiding spots and plenty of room to throw or kick balls. Some days, Blue's mom takes them to a place that has several huge dirt tracks that are mostly mud in many places, and helps them change into protective, full-body suits with helmets and gloves. Then they ride dirt bikes or ATVs – all of them start on the easiest track, but Piper and Blue switch to the one with all the hills while Jacob and Michael stay on the easy ones – and they always end up pretty much covered in mud and dirt from head to toe. Here, though, getting clean is almost as much fun as getting dirty, because the easiest way to clean the suits is to hose them down, and nobody says that they actually have to take them _off_ for that.

All four of them are lucky to be able to keep their eyes open until they get back to Blue's grandparents' house most days, so they usually end up taking a nap before dinner; Jacob and Michael in the room they share and Piper and Blue in theirs, and when dinner rolls around it's either the seven of them or more, with several of Blue's uncles or aunts stopping by more often than not.

Piper doesn't speak French so most of the conversation is in English for her sake, but she still manages to pick up a few words.

It's over way too soon for anyone's liking, but Piper doesn't mind too much because it means another long flight; one that – like the first one – has Jacob in the window seat, her in the middle and Blue by the aisle, with Michael, Anna and Peter in front of them. Piper's attention is divided fairly evenly between Jacob, Blue and the view outside the windows; at least until Jacob nods off about halfway through the flight.

“Look at that,” she says - softly, since she doesn't want to wake Jacob up – and nods towards the small window, beyond which the clouds are painted a warm gold by the afternoon sun. “Imagine always being high enough in the air to see that.”

“Like a never-ending flight?” is low question.

“Maybe,” Piper says. “Or like... what if bits of the Earth floated above the clouds?” She looks over, and watches Blue peer out the window. “And you could live there? The maybe instead of people wanting to live by water, they'd want to live somewhere they could always watch the clouds.”

“All I can think about is how gravity would somehow have to be strong enough to keep most of the Earth as it is, but also weak enough to let bits of it float into the air.”

Piper snickers, and nudges her. “Hey. There doesn't have to be an explanation for _everything_. Especially not in an imaginary world.”

“I think your imagination is a lot better than mine,” Blue notes, but she says it like that's an idea she likes. “It sounds like it'd make a nice book, though.” She smiles, and nudges Piper back. “Maybe one day, you'll write it.”

Maybe. “Only if you help me figure out the bits that _need_ to have an explanation.”

“Deal.”

\---•♥•---

Blue isn't bumped further ahead this year. She starts 8th grade instead of 6th just like she started 7th instead of 5th last year, while Piper is quite content to follow her charted path and keep up with her new, 5th grade schedule. It kind of sucks for Blue to still be bored for another year of classes, but since the high school isn't anywhere near the primary- or secondary school – is, in fact, in another town entirely - Piper is selfishly glad that Blue isn't going to enroll there at least until next year, because then they get that much longer to walk or bike to and from school together.

“Why _aren't_ you being moved ahead more?” she asks on one of the first afternoons; one where they've set their bikes and backpacks against a lamp post and are picking small, sweet plums from a wild tree. “It's not like you're not smart enough.”

“Dad said something about balance,” Blue tells her; climbing higher with more care than she'd normally take to keep from staining her school clothes. “About how I have the smarts, but how I'm probably not really ready when it comes to social stuff.”

“You're getting better at that, though,” Piper points out, and takes a good hold of a thick branch before reaching out for a particularly colorful cluster of fruits. “So, what? Next year, then?”

Blue is chewing, and so takes a moment to shrug, spit out the pit and then swallow. “Maybe,” she agrees, but doesn't sound all that concerned about it. “I guess we'll see.”

“Don't sound so excited about it.”

“Funny.” A pink tongue pokes out at her. “I dunno. I... kind of would like to have classes that were more interesting,” Blue then admits, and spends a few seconds turning a plum between her fingers. “But I also kind of like not having all new people around me this year. It's a lot easier.”

Piper settles herself in a spot where a thick, near-vertical branch divides itself in two, and bites into a fruit of her own. “Because you're used to them from last year?”

“Mm.”

That's good, then. Piper isn't sure if Blue's dad is right about her not being ready for high school socially, but since he has actually _gone_ to high school, she guesses that he'd probably know. She also guesses that Blue might have a hard time fitting in there, anyway, since high school kids look like... well, like _high school kids._ Like people halfway between kids and adults; the boys with broader shoulders and the girls with narrower waists. True, Blue is starting to look a little like that, too, but while she's still growing enough that Piper just barely comes up to her shoulder, she doesn't _look_ like a high school kid.

Yet, at least.

So grade 8 and 5 it is for them, respectively, and since Blue doesn't seem to have an issue with not moving ahead further, Piper decides to not feel guilty about being glad to have her best friend close by for another year. It makes it a lot easier for them to keep up with each other now that they've gone back to one free afternoon and maybe a half a weekend to spend together; even if they also spend a good amount of that time on their homework. Meeting every morning and afternoon helps too, and by now, the habit is five years old and so ingrained that it's almost like breathing. Whenever one of them has to miss one or both walks – which is rare, but does happen sometimes – the other usually knows in advance, so to say that Piper is surprised when Blue isn't waiting for her one afternoon would be an understatement.

There wasn't any mention of early TKD practice this morning and Blue didn't seem like she was getting sick when Piper saw her at lunch, so she guesses that maybe her best friend is just running a little behind. That doesn't happen much, but since Blue is getting better at talking to people, maybe she's just taking a few extra minutes to say goodbye to her classmates.

Piper leans against the bike racks and waits; she looks up at the sky and goes over the assignments she needs to hand in tomorrow, and which ones she still needs to look at one more time to make sure she's happy with them.

That uses up about ten minutes.

Now the waiting is starting to get a little strange; enough that Piper looks back over her shoulder to the main doors of the junior high building. There's no one there, though – at least not that she knows – and so she watches steadily smaller groups of kids leave for the day without seeing any sign of Blue.

Piper peers down the bike rack and sees Blue's bike there, alright, and she's really starting to wonder because her best friend is clearly still here; unless she for some reason decided to walk home, leave early, and not breathe word one to Piper about it. That thought is so unlike Blue that it's actually funny, so Piper snickers and shakes her head--

And stops laughing when she looks in the other direction, because that... looks like Blue's dad's car. That's because it _is_ , she determines, by way of walking closer and seeing the little plush bear hanging from the rear view mirror (Papa Bear, Blue and her brothers call him sometimes), and now Piper is getting worried because parents usually don't show up during normal school days for good reasons.

It's enough to make her go inside, which feels a little odd but probably isn't something she's _not_ supposed to do any more than Blue wasn't supposed to go inside the primary school that one day. The building isn't familiar but the layout kind of is, and if Blue's dad is here, then Piper guesses that she can probably find them both somewhere near the principal's office.

She's right. Piper finds her way to the outer office where she guesses there's usually a secretary, and from beyond the door marked _Principal_ , she can just barely hear the low murmur of voices. That explains why she can't see Blue's dad, but Blue herself is sitting in one of the plastic chairs in the little waiting area; hands in her lap, head tilted back against the wall and eyes closed.

Piper opens her mouth to say hi – possibly to crack a joke about what in the world Blue got herself into this time – but there's an odd sort of strain in the skin around her best friend's eyes and a tightness to her shoulders and hands that makes her pause. It doesn't feel like a _time_ to joke, somehow, and while Piper doesn't know exactly _how_ she knows that, it's a sort of instinct that she's usually better off listening to than ignoring.

So instead of speaking, she cross the room quietly; takes off her backpack and sets it down, and then takes a seat next to Blue – who still hasn't opened her eyes; let alone moved – with her hands folded and her elbows on her knees, so she can lean forward and get a better look at her best friend.

“You holdin' up, Blue?” she asks, and while her voice is soft, Blue sucks in a hard breath and jerks; her head snapping up and her back straightening in a snap like she hadn't even heard Piper come in. “Hey; easy.” Piper straightens too, and holds up her hands. “You okay?”

Blue stares at her for a long moment, and then seems to come back to herself with a sigh and a brief closing of her eyes. “I'm not really sure,” she murmurs, and Piper is about to ask what she means when the voices behind the door pick back up, because she's close enough to hear them now.

“ _With all due respect, Mr. Fitzroy, the boy did ask.”_

There's a screeching sound like a chair being pushed back too fast, and then a low thump. _“With all due respect, **Sir** , my daughter told him no.”_

“ _I realize that, but the young man assured me that he thought she was simply doing what young women do on TV.”_

“ _I don't particularly care what sort of drivel he watches; my daughter is not some coy damsel from a daytime soap. She says exactly what she means; a fact that little twerp should damn well know after spending 18 months in the same class as her!”_

“ _Well...”_ There's a long, uncomfortable-sounding pause. _“Boys will b--”_

“ _So help me, if you finish that sentence, I will punch you in the mouth.”_

“ _There is no need for threats, Mr. Fitzroy.”_

“ _Unfortunately, that seems to be the only tool for penetrating the haze surrounding your thick head!”_ Blue's dad isn't shouting, but he's certainly getting louder. _“Do you really not see the issue in the fact that one of your students was **assaulted** by another student?”_

“ _Sir, it was **just a kiss**.”_

“ _He pushed my little girl into a corner and **held her there** , after she clearly said that she wasn't interested!”_ A loud _BANG_ punctuates that sentence; like someone smacking a table hard. _“What sort of an education do you provide here that a 15-year old boy doesn't understand the meaning of the word no?!”_

Things quiet down after that, which is probably a good thing since that little bit was enough to have Piper's guts aching. Even if she _could_ hear more she doubts that she'd really want to, so instead, she reaches out to take Blue's hand like she has so many times when her best friend is upset for whatever reason.

The flinch about breaks her heart, and Piper realizes that while it might, in fast, have been 'just a kiss', that's a lot for someone like Blue. Maybe even too much.

“Sorry.” They both say it at the same time, and then send each other the same, small smile.

“I'm kinda jumpy,” Blue then mutters. “I'm sorry. I wish I wasn't.”

“Don't worry about it.” Piper lifts a hand to pat her on the shoulder, and then pauses and lets it hang somewhat awkwardly in the air. “Is it okay if I touch you?”

Blue sucks her lower lip between her teeth and looks down; to where her thumbs are pressing into the backs of her own hands. “I don't know.”

“... okay.” That... actually hurts a lot, but Blue is just being honest and Piper can tell that she isn't happy about it either, so she lets her hand drop back down. “Can I ask what happened?”

“I think he thought I was joking,” is the answer. “When I said no. So he... held me by the elbows and then there was a wall and I don't... remember a whole lot.” She pauses, and looks at the opposite wall without really seeing it. “I think I kneed him in the groin, when I realized that I could actually, y'know, get him away. But most of it's a blur until--” A nod towards the principal's office, and a tiny smile. “-- Papa Bear.”

Piper nods slowly, and tries to not focus on the pressure in her chest; like a big fist is squeezing her heart. “Did he hurt you?”

“No.” Blue shakes her head. “It was just a kiss.”

It sounds simple enough, but Piper has the sinking feeling that it really, really isn't.

\---•♥•---

It's probably good that Piper hasn't learned how to fight. If she had, she would have used every hard-won skill on that _stupid boy_ , and since it's after the fact, it probably wouldn't count as defending and would land her in a whole lot of hot water. Blue won't even tell her the boy's name no matter how many times Piper asks, so maybe she's worried that if she does, Piper might hunt him down anyway.

Admittedly, her concern is justified, because Piper can't remember ever being so _angry_ with someone else. Blue spent _literal years_ working to get to the point she was at in regards to making friends and getting better at being around people, and that _idiot_ took it away in under five minutes. _No_ , he didn't mean to do that, but he _did_ , and damn it, when someone says no, _it means no_. But the boy didn't think about that, and so now, Piper's best friend is as quiet and still and withdrawn as she was when she was 9, and physical touches have gone from being steadily offered to non-existent.

Piper tries to help in the ways that she can. When Blue doesn't talk, _she_ does; asking questions and working to structure her sentences in ways that will draw some kind of response, and only ever touching Blue when she is in full view and the touch won't come as a surprise. She gets more chances to do so, too, because Blue isn't going to her TKD practices any more. She did, about a week after the Thing – Piper refuses to call it the Kiss, because a kiss should be _welcome_ – but the girl she was training with grabbed her by the elbow and Blue just sort of locked herself away in her own head for the rest of the night; like that touch was enough to put her right back into the moment where the Thing happened.

The most frustrating thing, though, is how Blue blames _herself_. Not for the Thing, but for what it did to her. And Piper can't seem to convince her not to, no matter how hard she tries.

“He didn't know I'd react like that,” she says, and Piper thinks that he still shouldn't have done it.

“He kissed me because he likes me,” she says, and Piper thinks that he still shouldn't have done it.

“It was just a kiss,” she says, and Piper thinks that yeah, maybe that's true, but he still shouldn't have done it.

But she stops trying to argue her point after a while. All that does is make Blue cautious around _her_ , and that definitely isn't what she wants to accomplish. So instead, Piper tries to just _be there;_ to spend time with Blue and help her get back into the swing of things by acting normal while at the same time trying not to push too hard, too fast. And it helps, to a certain extent; Blue does grow more at ease around her again after a month or two, but it hurts to notice that outside of Blue's family it's _only_ around her.

Piper can do little more than stand by and watch as Blue slowly loses most of what she has worked so hard to gain, because much as it clearly frustrates her best friend, summoning those skills and that energy just isn't as easy as it was before.

So kids start talking again, and by the time Blue turns 13, those extra hours they have together disappear once more; not to taekwondo, but to time spent with a lady called Dr. Abrams, who works with kids like Blue for a living. That helps, too, to a point, but Piper can tell that Blue is _tired_ of being different, and getting increasingly angry with herself because of the fact that she can't change it. She smiles, but it's rarer and more dim, and while she does stop stiffening the second she sets foot on school grounds, that's only because she seems to lose all interest in it.

Before, Blue didn't really know how to talk to her classmates, but she tried. Now, it seems like she can't find a _reason_ to try; not with anyone other than Piper and her family. She's still smart as a whip and her homework is still handed in on time, but Piper knows because she keeps an ear out that her participation is pretty much nil, and Blue's parents are driving themselves crazy trying to find some way to _help_ her.

They don't even go to play with Jacob's class anymore, which makes _him_ sad, and the whole thing is almost a disease; spreading like rings in the water.

Piper doesn't know what to do. Even her mom can't come up with any ideas; instead saying that the best thing Piper can probably do is to just continue to be there. But still, it seems that as the days pass, Blue just grows angrier with herself. She never takes it out on anyone else, of course, but she does grow increasingly quiet, and - if pressed on the subject – simply doesn't respond. At all.

So in mid-spring, Piper learns from Blue that they're moving the next summer; that Dr. Abrams recommended a school in Ohio where Blue can be taught at the level she's at academically, and also get help with other things. And Piper kind of saw it coming, what with that talk she once overheard between Blue's mom and Sarah, but the thought still hurts more than she knew it would, and she can't even hug Blue because that really wouldn't help matters any.

Blue doesn't _want_ to move. That's what she says and Piper believes her, but she also trusts Blue's parents enough to think that this is probably the best way in which they can help her.

“I'll miss you,” is therefore all she says in response, and takes Blue's hand in a light clasp as they stand alone in the Fitzroy's living room. “A lot.”

“Yeah.” Blue gives her fingers a little squeeze. “I'll miss you too.”

“Why?”

The question doesn't come from Piper, but from the door, and both of them snap their heads around to see Jacob standing there. Something that Piper, at least, suspects to be unfortunate, since Blue also told her that he and Michael don't _know_ about the move yet, since it was only decided the night before after they went to bed. So Piper has no clue how to answer his question, and it's clear from the look on Blue's face that she doesn't either.

“Dad?” she calls instead, and Piper twines their fingers because her voice sounds a little shaky.

Peter's standing behind Jacob soon enough, at least. With Anna and Michael out, the house is quiet enough for him to hear Blue easily. “What is it, half-pint?”

Blue's licks her lips and takes a breath. “Jakey just asked me why I'll miss Piper.”

“Oh?” Peter quirks an eyebrow in that way that Blue's also started to, and then his face clears. “ _Oh.”_ He looks down at Jacob and places a hand on his shoulder. “How about we talk about this when your mom and Mikey get home, huh? Like a family thing.”

Jacob, however, scowls. “No. Something's up. What it is?”

There's several minutes of arguing back and forth over that point; Jacob wanting to know _now_ and Peter wanting to wait until everyone is there, but Jacob must be able to feel that it's something big and not particularly good, because he just _does not give up,_ and Piper can feel Blue's fingers twitch more and more between her own the longer it goes on.

“Dad,” she finally says, and has to raise her voice to be heard. “It's okay. Just--” Blue closes her eyes and sighs, and then looks at Jacob when she opens them again. “We have to move in a few months, Jakey. I don't want to, but... I'm starting a new school and it's not close enough for us to stay here.”

It's very clear that Jacob believes her, and also very clear that he isn't happy with the news in any way, shape or form. “You ruin everything!” he yells after a long, hard glare; with his eyes wet and his face red and screwed up in anger. “I _hate you!”_

“Jacob Olivier Fitzroy!” Blue's father gets a firm hold of the boy and takes him out of the room, and Piper can't hear anything after that other than the sound of her own blood rushing in her ears.

That was _not_ fair. And she _knows_ that Jacob's little and hasn't really learned to think before he speaks, but... right in that moment – much as she loves this entire family – Piper hates him a little bit, because Blue looks like she's been punched in the chest. She doesn't even move. She just stands there and _stares_ at the spot of floor where Jacob was standing; still and quiet and barely even breathing, like it _hurts_ so much that her body needs a minute to figure out how to process it.

“Hey.” Piper reaches out and settles a careful hand on her shoulder. “You know he doesn't mean it, Blue. He's just upset.”

Blue smiles a little but it doesn't reach her eyes at all, and when she blinks, there's the slow trail of two tears down her cheeks. "He's right, though. If it wasn't for me--"

“ _If_ \--” She gently interrupts. “-- you weren't exactly how you are, you wouldn't be the big sister he loves so much. Okay?”

“Yeah. Okay.” Blue says that, but she also looks down and Piper can tell that she doesn't believe it.

“Blue--”

“Just...” Blue takes a breath but it's long and shuddering, and then backs up until she hits the couch and falls into it. “ _Fuck._ ” Low, intense, and hoarse. “How do I keep messing everything up?”

“You're not messing up.” Piper follows her and sits next to her, and touches her arm lightly when Blue's back starts shaking. “Blue...” Her chest is aching again because her best friend is hurting _so bad_ and Piper can't _fix it_. “C'mere.” It's chancy but probably needed, so Piper slowly slips an arm around Blue's shoulders and tugs, and gets her first hug in months from her best friend for all the wrong reasons.

“It's not fair,” Blue chokes out; her face wet against Piper's shoulder and her head hot under Piper's fingers. “Why can't I just be _normal?”_

It's April of 1996. Blue is 13 and Piper is 12, and the world is turning itself upside down around them.

 


	8. Chapter 8

Blue and her family leave the small town in mid-July of 1996. Piper hates it but she _tries_ to understand, and while she knows in her head that this is the best thing for Blue, her heart won't listen to reassurances from herself or anyone else that they can still write and call.

It's not the same. And while Piper has plenty of other friends and is anything but lonely even after Blue leaves and school starts back up – complete with a new principal - she still misses her.

“ _St. Isidore's is nice enough,”_ Blue tells her during one of their bi-weekly phone calls, which are scheduled for 9 PM Piper's time and maxed at half an hour because long-distance is really expensive. _“They sort us by level instead of by age, so everyone is even in class and it isn't boring. But I miss walking with you. The mornings are way too quiet.”_

“I miss walking with you too,” Piper sighs, and closes her eyes because then she can almost pretend that Blue is sitting next to her. “Is Jacob still mad?”

There's a low snort, and while Blue's laugh usually makes Piper smile, this one just makes her chest hurt. _“Spitting. Mom says he'll get better when he gets used to everything.”_

“What about Michael?”

This time, the laugh is a chuckle and a little more genuine. _“He's a trooper. He just tries to mend fences and hugs both me and Jakey a lot more these days.”_ A pause, and a swallow that Piper can hear. _“God, I... I just wish that their lives didn't get messed up so bad because of me, y'know?”_

“Blue.” Piper pitches her voice a little lower. “This is not your fault, okay? In fact, I'm pretty sure that if the choice had been yours, you wouldn't have moved at all.”

Another wry snort. _“You got that right_.”

“So trust your folks, alright? They're smart.” She finds a smile, and tries to lift the mood a bit. “Not as smart as you, maybe, but still pretty okay by everyone's standards.”

This laugh is a lot closer to the real one. _“I'll make sure to pass on the vote of confidence,”_ Blue drawls, and then there's a pause and another voice in the background before she sighs. _“I gotta go, Piper. Take care.”_

Piper bites her tongue, and doesn't argue because there's no point. “You too, Blue.”

\---•♥•---

There are letters too, of course, aside from the calls. Some of them describe Blue's classes - like the new ones that focus almost exclusively on social skills and dealing with emotion – and some are just little stories about a field trip or even something that Blue just makes up because she thinks that Piper will like reading it.

She's never wrong, and Piper always sends some short little stories of her own back; some that she has already written, and some that she writes specifically for that purpose.

Sometimes the letters contain photos, and while Piper always likes receiving those – and takes care to send some back – she loves it best when the drawings start coming. Blue has improved a _lot_ since the doodles Piper remembers from the edges of her school notes, and there's a short letter with the very first ones that explains how her teachers think that drawing is something that can help calm her down when everything gets to be too much, so she's been practicing.

There isn't anything about Jacob getting better when December rolls around, though, and so mostly, Piper worries. She can't do so constantly since school is school and tennis and swimming are also steadily taking up more of her free time, and she thinks that maybe that's something her mom is kind of doing on purpose to _keep_ her from worrying.

The communication is slow but it's _there_ , so while Piper does worry, it's not near as much as she does when her mom loses her job and they have to move somewhere else for her to get a new one. But it'll be fine, she thinks, and sends Blue her new address and phone number as soon as she can. The letters wont come that much slower for being three towns over.

Except not even a month after Piper and her mom move into a new apartment, they have to move again because the job Piper's mom landed is being moved to another _state,_ and she can either go along or look for a new one a second time. Piper's mom swears a lot about that, and Piper makes a mental note to not repeat those words within the hearing range of any adult for at least another four years. It's a good job, though – one that pays way more than she's made in Piper's entire life so far – and mail can be forwarded to Boston, too.

Piper doesn't send Blue her new address and phone number before moving this time; for one because there's very little time, and for another because her last letter to Blue came back, so she must have moved as well. She does worry, though, as she settles into her new, big bedroom in the North End and helps her mom decorate their swanky new place between her new piano lessons, because there still isn't a letter from Blue even when winter changes into spring and Piper's 13th birthday is right around the corner, and she has no right address to write to with her own, or to ask to Blue if she's gotten an e-mail address because Piper has one now and this way they won't have to wait for letters.

One week after turning 13, Piper gets a whole stack of letters all at once. It's starts out exciting with _Jacob actually hugged me today!_ , but soon turns from a worrying _Mom and dad are arguing again_ or _There's some kind of problem with the house and we have to move_ to a downright heartbreaking _They're splitting up and Jacob says it's my fault_ and _I'm at this address now, but we're moving soon and I don't know where to._

There's no answer at the newest number, but the newest address, at least, is _very_ new, so Piper writes the fastest letter ever and makes sure to include her new address, her new phone number, and her new e-mail address, as well.

She posts it the next morning on her way to school, and gets it back three weeks later with a big, red stamp.

_RETURN TO SENDER  
_ _Recipient not known_

It's March of 1997. Blue is 14 and Piper just turned 13, and neither of them know where the other is.

 


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a bit of a whopper, but it does span about six years and one very important evening. If anyone is curious, the song briefly referenced is Vanessa Carlton's _A Thousand Miles_.

Time and tide, they say, wait for no man, and life goes on in spite of distance and unknown addresses and how much you miss someone. It takes a long time for Piper to stop thinking of Blue several times a day, but bit by bit, she gets to grips with the fact that there's nothing she can do.

She never forgets her, though.

She gets a first kiss and a first boyfriend - and a second one just a few weeks later - and misses Blue and wishes that she could tell her about it. She makes the honor roll and wins her first swimming trophy in Boston, and misses Blue and wishes that she could tell her about it. She spends the entire day before her first piano recital sick with nerves, and _really_ misses Blue and wishes that she could talk to her about it.

By the start of 1999 – a week or so before Blue's Sweet Sixteenth – Piper has had a special folder under her AOL inbox called _Letters to Blue_ for months because 'Elizabeth Fitzroy' doesn't exist even according to the Internet (St. Isidore's does, but they won't give out contact information for current or previous students). So Piper adds a new draft to that folder every time she wants to write to her, because even if she knows that Blue can't read the messages or reply to them, it still kind of feels like keeping in touch.

There are exactly 300 messages saved in that folder by January of 2000, and it becomes 301 when Piper gets her first kiss from a girl; 302 when she gets her first girlfriend a month after, and 310 when she comes out to her mother two months after that because dating is _really_ friggin' frustrating when having to learn to deal with both sexes. She saves the stories she writes there; she tells Blue about being in the last half of high school and getting her first cell phone and about maybe thinking of journalism as a college major, and about how her mom has met someone and how _this_ Danny actually seems like a cool guy.

She asks Blue if Jacob is still angry, and tells her about playing doubles with three of her team mates under the cooling autumn sun. She asks if Blue's thinking of colleges yet – _I bet you are, you brainiac; maybe the question should be how long you've been IN college –_ and where she wants to study. She asks Blue how her parents and grandparents and aunts and uncles and cousins and everyone are, and tells her that she wishes she had the address to at least some of them, because she bets that they'd know where Blue is.

If nothing else she gets plenty of typing practice, and that certainly doesn't hurt her position on the school paper.

On September 11, 2001, Piper takes her new PowerBook into the living room and sends Blue almost 500 messages over the course of the day – _Please don't be in NYC, Blue. Blue, please don't be on any of those planes; you or Mikey or Jacob or your folks or family. Oh my God, Blue; people are jumping. Please be safe. Please don't be there. I miss you. I really hope you're okay._ \- and she sits between her mom and Danny and watches with a sick sort of horror as the world turns on its ear all over again.

Even after that, life goes on. Or... _most_ of it does, while other parts don't really seem to change at all. A prime example of the latter is when a new song takes over the airwaves in early 2002, because the first time Piper hears it on the radio, she has to just sort of _stop_ doing her homework, and instead lean back in her chair to simply listen.

_It's always times like these when I think of you  
_ _And I wonder if you ever think of me_

That's message number 1178 to Blue, and Piper learns to play that song before she even gets sheet music for it.

In March, she turns 18, and her grades have been good enough all through high school that she has applied for colleges and scholarships all over the country. Her mom and Danny helped her narrow it down to the schools with good journalism programs, and in the late summer of 2002, she ends up setting off for the University of Florida in Gainesville; partly because their journalism program comes with high praise, and partly because she's dying to try out the heat of the subtropics after living her entire life in New England.

It's a switch; that's for damn sure, and maybe Piper goes a little bit nuts the first few months where she's truly out on her own. Her roommate is cute and seems to have a bit of a thing for her, and Piper is flattered and interested enough to go for it, so she does. It never does turn into anything serious, but they make acceptable friends and can figure out how to fit two people into a twin bed when they have to.

She calms down some after the first semester, though, and not _only_ because of her admittedly much lower GPA. So after spending her fall semester basically cutting loose, Piper spends her spring semester pulling herself back up. She gets back into at least swimming if not so much tennis; she spends the odd hour every now and then messing with her electronic keyboard, and ultimately ends up finishing out her freshman year with a 3.49, which she finds very acceptable after sitting on a 2.35 over the holidays. For summer it's back to Boston because Danny says her mom is going crazy missing her, and while Piper is getting very used to no sleeves pretty much ever, she's also learning enough about the Floridian climate to know that maybe summers aren't the best idea just yet.

Boston's drier heat is almost weird after spending a year around palm trees and humidities at 80 and over, but it only takes a week or two before it slips right back around Piper's shoulders like an old, well-worn coat. She cooks dinners with her mom and takes long, morning jogs with Danny, and looks up some of her old high school friends which turns into a plan for some sort of impromptu reunion. That rolls around way sooner than expected, and suddenly Piper is standing in a crowd of familiar faces outside a pub that has a _21 and under_ section, and she's pretty sure that Amy – who is tall and blonde and _fit_ and was way out of her league last year – is actually making eyes at her.

All signs point to a very interesting evening even without underage drinking, so Piper grins at Amy and is halfway through the door when there's a flicker of blonde – _very_ blonde – at the corner of her eye.

She didn't send as many messages to Blue over the last year – for one, TMI – but she never forgot her, and that one flicker is enough that Piper steps back and out towards the edge of the group, because as much as she _knows_ that it's kind of nuts and probably just a trick of the light or her imagination, she's still going to make sure. The flicker repeats, though, and this time, Piper manages to pin it down to a tall figure in low-heeled boots and denim jeans and a black leather jacket; one with a toned, but feminine shape, and with hair so bleached from the sun that it's almost white.

It's crazy. The odds are literally _astronomical,_ but there's something about that _gait_ and how that pale hair is just a little bit wavy, and Piper's heart lurches in her chest as she pushes herself out of the group; watches the figure amble down a road that's too narrow for cars, with a smooth, almost gliding stride that speaks of years of physical conditioning. So her feet move even as her brain tries to prepare for the most epic sense of disappointment yet, but--

“Blue?”

Piper swears that she's about to die of a heart attack before she reaches her twenties, because the figure _stops_. And turns. And yeah, her vision is blurring something awful but her smile is so wide that it actually _hurts_ because she has still never seen eyes quite so blue as that.

“Holy shit.” It's a whisper on the evening breeze and the voice is a little deeper than she remembers it, but then Blue is moving and Piper is too, and the first thing she thinks when she can see her clearly is that the grin that was a little too wide for her face when she was 13 fits her perfectly now. “Holy shit!”

Piper has about half a second to yelp when she's grabbed by the waist, but she just laughs instead because she's pulled into a hug so tight that it _aches_ ; Blue's arms warm and strong and _real_ around her back, Blue's face pressing into her shoulder and Piper's fingers in Blue's hair while her toes don't even touch the ground.

Blue still smells like sunlight and freshly cut grass; only now it's with the added tang of leather, and Piper likes it a lot.

“Holy shit,” Blue breathes one more time for good measure when she sets her down, and Piper chuckles because she gets it. “Piper Wright, _where_ did you come from?”

“Gainesville, Florida,” Piper answers gamely, and this grin still feels like it's going to split her face in half.

“Oo, yeah; I can see that,” Blue says, and pokes her cheek with one finger. “Look at that Sunshine State tan.”

“Stoppit.” Piper grabs her hand but doesn't let it go; doesn't even lose her smile because Blue _laughs_ and _damn_ , she's missed that sound. “Where did _you_ come from?”

Blue grins crookedly. “Santa Monica, California,” she answers; which explains the healthy, golden tan that's deeper than Piper remembers it and does _amazing_ things to her eyes. “I stopped by Oregon on the way to visit my father and _literally_ just got here last night, so I'm jet-lagged as all hell and you _might_ just be a delusion.”

Piper gives the skin between two long fingers a little pinch, and chuckles when Blue flinches. “Sure about that?”

“Rude.” She gets a glower for her cheek, and then a grin as Blue draws a line from the top of Piper's head to the space between her own eyebrows. “Hey; you come up past my shoulder!”

Oh, for... “Shut it!” Piper groans and smacks her in the chest, and while the mild blow is enough to make Blue teeter back a little, it's not enough to make her release the loose grip she has on Piper's waist. “I grew up some, alright?”

“Yeah.” Blue takes a half step back – still doesn't let go, though – and when that _gaze_ slips over Piper from head to toe and all the way back up, it's all but a physical touch and she has to really work to tamp down a blush. “I can see that.” Her smile shrinks into something that's almost impossibly gentle, and the hand on Piper's waist gives a little squeeze while the fingers she holds twine with her own. “You look great, Piper."

“You too, Blue,” Piper returns quietly, because she really, _really_ does; to the point where it's almost awkward because Piper has a _type_ and Blue fits it to a tee. Hell, Blue might have been the baseline. So that's... kind of weird, and she needs to stop dwelling on it before it becomes all she can think about. “Wait; California, and then Oregon?” She waits for Blue to nod. “Then what the hell are you doing in Boston?”

Blue shrugs. “My mom lives here. Has since I started college.”

“Get out.” Piper smacks her in the chest again and flushes a little at the tolerant grin. _“My_ mom lives here!”

“Get out,” Blue mimics, and smirks when Piper rolls her eyes. “Since when?”

“Since... God, less than a year after you guys moved. I went to both junior high and high school here.”

“Ah. So you pretty much count as a local now while I'm the tourist, huh?”

The question comes with a flicker of those eyes to a spot over Piper's shoulder, and she follows it to see her friends still waiting by the door to the pub; one of them lifting an arm in a universal gesture of 'what the hell?' when he sees her turn, and Amy – in particular – looking a little annoyed. “I guess so.” Previous engagements or not, she suddenly has very little interest indeed in spending the evening around anyone other than Blue, but that wouldn't really be fair to everyone else, would it?

So. “Hey.” She gives the hand in her own a little tug, and waits for those eyes to focus back on her. “Join us? I mean, if you don't have any plans.”

“I don't,” is the slow answer, alongside a quirked eyebrow. “You sure, though? Seems like you all had an evening ahead of you, and I'm pretty sure I'm not on the guest list.”

“I'm sure,” Piper nods, and now catches the other hand because no way is she letting her out of her sight yet. “Please, Blue? More the merrier, right?”

That earns her a chuckle, and the slow shake of Blue's head while an arm curls around her shoulders and tugs her back towards the pub. “I'm gonna figure out how to say no to you at some point.”

“Nah.” Piper winds an arm around Blue's waist in return, and finds the whole thing so easy and comfortable that it's almost ridiculous. “I'm completely irresistible.” The snort from next to her becomes a laugh, and Piper chuckles, too. “So. Santa Monica?”

“Yup.” Blue nods. “It's close to UCLA but it's not dorms, which don't really work that well for me.”

“Hm.” She digests that, and eyes that very fit frame – even more so than her own – from the corner of her eye. “You surf?”

That nets her a sideways look. “Not _everybody_ in Santa Monica surfs,” is the amused answer.

Piper gives the waist under her hand a little tweak. “That wasn't the question.”

Blue's mouth works for a few seconds as they walk; alternately pursing and stretching as if she's trying hard not to smile. “... yeah,” she then admits with a little wrinkle of her nose. “I do.”

“Hey.”

“Mm?”

“Say 'nah brah' for me. Please?”

She gets a _look,_ and then a smirk. “Nah, brah,” Blue obliges, and – of course - overdoes it to the point of goofiness.

Piper laughs in delight. “God; I missed you,” she sighs, and the arm around her shoulders tightens a little more in lieu of an actual, verbal response since they're now reaching the waiting, dozen-some-odd of people. “Hey, guys; sorry about that. This is Bl--”

“Liza Delaurant.” When Piper catches herself and pauses, Blue takes over smoothly – _that_ explains why she didn't show up anywhere as a Fitzroy - and lifts one hand in a little wave. “Hi. Okay if I crash on you guys?”

“Sure.” The answer comes from Eric, who is quintessentially tall and dark and handsome and senior year's prom king, and Piper sends him a sidelong glance because she _knows_ that look on his face. “More the merrier; right, Piper?”

“Uh huh; that's what I said.” She keeps an eye on him as Blue introduces herself properly to everyone, and old habits really must die hard, because when they finally _do_ enter the pub, she also gets a hold of Eric's elbow and holds him back a little. “Go easy on her, alright?”

He gives her a puzzled frown. “What?”

“Eric, I know what you look like when someone catches your interest.” She waits for him to color and clear his throat, and chuckles in response. “I'm not saying _don't_ , you know? But I know how you usually make your interest known, and she's never really been that good with stuff like physical contact.”

That makes him eye her curiously. “She seemed fine walking up here with her arm around you.”

“Yeah, true.” Piper nods, and sends a glance over his shoulder to where their little group is crowding into padded seats around a long table. “But that's _me_. We grew up together, so I'm a different story.”

Eric frowns at her. “So how have I never met h-- whoa, whoa; wait.” He holds up his hands, and then juts a thumb over his shoulder. _“That's_ Blue?”

“In the flesh.” She has to smile at the stunned look on his face. “Not how you pictured her?”

“Well, you _did_ describe a 13-year old girl.” He's looking over at the table too, now, so Piper does the same and watches Blue shimmy out of her jacket and drape it across the back of her chair while she talks to someone across from her. “Shit; Piper. You guys walked up here like you'd seen each other _yesterday;_ not seven years ago.”

“Some friendships are like that.” Piper gives him arm a little pat, and raises an eyebrow at him. _“Without_ having to get naked with each other.”

Eric chuckles. “Hey; the naked part is fun, too,” he defends; lifting one hand and then letting it fall. “But, um... if it's all the same to you, I think I'll leave her alone.” His lips are barely even moving, but there's a knowing, little twinkle in his eyes. “I'd rather not try to horn in on your territory.”

“Oh, for fuck's sake,” Piper mutters under her breath; two fingers coming up to rub at her forehead. “Alright; so I had a crush on her. I was _twelve_.”

“And now you're not.” Eric shrugs, and rocks a little on the balls of his feet. “But remember what you told me; that nanny-type lady who said something about how Piper's Blue hung the moon?” He pauses there, and waits for her to nod hesitantly. “You still look at her like she did.”

Piper spends at least three seconds just staring at him, and then snorts. “You, buddy-boy, need to get your eyes checked.”

“Uh-huh.” He looks so smugly amused that Piper kind of wants to smack him, and then he ruins the whole thing by reaching out to chuck her gently on the chin. “I'm rooting for you anyway.”

“Ass.” Piper shoves his hand away, but chuckles with him anyway because he's a damn good friend. “C'mon. Let's stop being antisocial bums.”

\---•♥•---

Damn if the evening doesn't seem to be a success, Piper thinks some time later; when everybody's gotten a few non-alcoholic drinks in them and strangely seem more loosened up and relaxed anyway. She's managing to talk to everyone and not ignore Blue, though _she_ , meanwhile, seems perfectly capable of holding her own, with the only sign of her old discomfort with unfamiliar people being the fact that she's sitting at the end of the table to have a little more air around her.

“So waitwaitwait, hang on,” one of the guys says; James, by the sound of it. “How the hell do you do _two_ undergraduate degrees at once?”

Blue chuckles. “Excellent time management skills and little to no social life.”

A laugh goes around the table at that, and Piper chuckles into her glass, too. The only one who seems a little off mood-wise is Amy, but she never did like not being the center of attention.

"Man." Michelle is the one to speak up this time, and does so with a shake of her head. "I hope you know what you're doing, or you're gonna burn out before you're halfway through your junior's, at the latest."

"I think I'll be fine," Blue says, with a crooked little smile that Piper knows to mean that there's something she isn't telling. "I've managed this far."

"What are you; some kind of freak genius?” This time it's Amy talking, and there's enough of a veiled bite in her tone that Piper cuts her eyes to her immediately.

Blue, however, just shrugs a single shoulder and takes a sip from the bottle in her hand. “Kinda, yeah.”

 _Down, Cujo_. Piper intentionally focuses on a question aimed her way by Eric – who is sitting next to her - because whether Blue isn't picking up on the tone or just refusing to let herself be baited, she's clearly capable of handling the situation and Piper's apparently overcharged, protective instincts need to take a friggin' chill pill. Old habits die _really_ hard, though, because even as she focuses on Eric, she just gets more on edge the more she hears Amy's voice at the edge of her hearing; low and steadily more condescending, like she's speaking to a child.

Jesus Christ, and she was considering making a move on her.

A little poke to her shin under the table distracts her, though, and she glances over to see Blue send her the barest hint of a wink and quickly move one hand in shapes that Piper has to really work to remember to meaning of.

 _Just words_.

Hrmph. Piper sends her a wry look in response and follows it up with an apologetic one, since she was the one who talked her into even coming. And yeah, maybe it is just words and maybe Blue still doesn't mind, but Piper damn well does; enough that she eyes her half-full glass and wonders how hard it would be to stage some kind of accident that ends up with the contents of it on Amy, somehow.

“Whoops,” she mutters under her breath as she takes another sip, and then smiles against the lip of the glass because she remembers Blue doing just that to her at one point; albeit with a lot more liquid and _definitely_ by accident, since she also got the soda all over herself.

Then she remembers the moments after that, and almost chokes on the sip she just took.

Blue isn't the only one looking at her now. “You alright?” comes the question, along with the quirk of a golden eyebrow as Blue lifts her bottle for a sip of her own.

Piper blinks, and her brain-to-mouth filter really needs to go in for service. “I've seen you naked.”

The gods of timing are cruel indeed, and _that_ is most assuredly what's called a spit-take. Blue manages to clap a hand over her mouth, at least, which means that most of it goes down her own front and only a few, stray drops veer off to the side to hit Amy; a damn good catch, too, since she's laughing hard enough for her shoulders to shake. Hell, everyone is, and Piper blushes to the roots of her hair and grins sheepishly while Amy swears and grabs for every napkin on the table.

Well, that wasn't _planned_ , but... gift horses.

“Excuse me,” Blue chokes out, and blinks several times to clear her eyes. “I'm just gonna--” She indicates her own, semi-sodden front – a dark top, thankfully – and snickers again. “Yeah.”

Piper watches her go and covers her eyes with a sigh at the playful wolf-whistling from the others, because _Jesus Christ_ , she can't believe she even _said that_. “Is it warm in here?” she wonders, and flips them all off when they laugh again. “You guys suck; we were _eight!_ ”

“That just means there's a lot more of her to see now.” That thankfully comes in a murmur from Eric, and is low enough that no one else overhears.

Piper elbows him in the ribs anyway. “Shut up,” she mutters back, and sees him grin from the corner of her eye, which... dammit, she knows better than to give him this sort of material. Fortunately, Amy's swearing about the roughly five, drop-sized stains on her 'dry clean only' shirt draws everyone's attention pretty well, and Piper only barely restrains herself from rolling her eyes.

 _Jesus Christ_ , and she was considering making a move on her.

“I mean, what kind of moron does that?!” Amy demands, and curses as she pinches at one stain. “This is dry-clean only!”

“If it helps, so is mine.” That comment comes from Blue, who now comes to a stop at the end of the table and unquestionably looks a lot worse, spatter-wise. “Definitely my fault, though, and I'm sorry. “ She claims her jacket from the back of her chair, and slips a wallet form the inside pocket before fishing out a few bills and placing them on the table. “That should cover cleaning costs, right?”

Amy just glares.

Blue chuckles under her breath, and gives her head a little shake. “Probably about time I head home,” she says, and shrugs into her jacket before using one hand to tug her hair free from under the collar. “Nice meeting you all; have a great evening.” There's a smile, then a hand on Piper's shoulder, and a gentle squeeze. “I'll see you later.”

Then she _leaves_ , and Piper is so stunned that it takes her several heartbeats to jump out of her seat... only to find a hand curled around her wrist.

“Amy!” Piper stares at her because _what in the actual fuck_. “She's _leaving.”_

“Let her!” Amy sneers as she lets go of Piper's arm, and continues to mop at her stained shirt with a stack of napkins. “God, what a _weirdo_. What the hell do you even _want_ with som-- HEY!”

It's doesn't make sense to be such a bitch over a few drops, so Piper stands and – before she can think better of it – foregoes subtlety entirely and empties her remaining drink over Amy's head.

“ _Fuck off,”_ she then growls, and sets her glass down with a hard _clonk_. “She is worth a _thousand_ of you.” Everyone is staring and Piper doesn't care; just pushes her way to the door and then out of it and searches desperately for blonde hair and black leather.

She spots her; a few hundred feet down the road and moving further away so Piper takes off after her because _hell no_ , she just _found her_ again. “Blue!”

Blue hears her, and turns fast enough to catch Piper by the shoulders and keep them from outright colliding. “Hey!” Her eyes are wide and her jaw a little slack. “Piper, what the hell's wrong?”

“What's _wr--”_ Piper curls her fingers into the collar of Blue's jacket and _shakes_. “You _left;_ that's what's wrong! You just _walked out_.”

“I was ruining your evening.” Blue's voice is very soft and very calm, and her fingers slip around Piper's elbows to guide her off of the sidewalk and into the mouth of a narrow alley. “I figured that the best thing to do was to leave you and your friends in peace and catch up with you later; alone.”

“Blue...” Piper is maybe five heartbeats away from shaking her some more because she clearly doesn't _get it_ , but she manages to take a deep breath and flatten her hands against Blue's collarbones, instead. “Do you have my phone number?”

That earns her a frown. “No?”

Piper nods, and takes another slow, purposely calm breath. “Do you have my e-mail address?”

“... no.” Slower this time, and Blue's head is ducking a little like she's catching on.

“Do you know _where I live?”_ She waits just long enough for the blonde head to shake, and then loses her hard-won calm in a hot flash of pure emotion. “Then how the _fuck_ were you going to ca-- Jesus, Blue!” Piper punches her in the shoulder and squeezes her eyes shut because her vision is blurring too much to see, anyway. “I haven't seen you in _seven years_. You can't just--” Her voice cracks, and she's only vaguely aware of the hands on her shoulders now tugging her forward. “-- waltz back into my life and then _disappear_ like--”

Blue's arms are folding around her in an embrace that's as close and comfortable as her mother's, and Piper just falls apart. Every moment of _missing_ and every second of _wishing_ dump themselves on her head and then slide right back off in the span of a single heartbeat, and all she can do is _hang on_ and try to _breathe_ while she sobs into Blue's shoulder and those achingly familiar fingers stroke the back of her head.

“You're right,” Blue whispers. “You're right. I'm sorry.” She's rocking them both gently from side to side, and her palm is warm and solid against Piper's back. “I should have thought of that. I'm sorry.” There's a short, wan little chuckle. “I guess part of me is still thinking that I'll just see you on our way to school tomorrow, like way back in Small Town, USA.” A pause, and the weight of her cheek against Piper's head. “Kinda stupid, huh?”

“Urgh.” Piper groans in both agreement and protest because Blue is anything _but_ stupid except for when she really _is,_ but she also manages to get herself back under control and straighten up. “God... Sorry about your jacket.”

Blue looks down at the wide, wet spot over her chest that's reflecting a little more of the streetlights, and shrugs. “S'alright; leather cleans up. Besides--” The corner of her mouth quirks faintly. “-- I seem to remember owing you one.”

“Hm.” She finds a small smile for the shared memory; shitty though the circumstances where. “Cotton-blend can be chucked in the washer, at least.”

“And leather can be wiped down.” Blue curls a finger under her chin and turns her face towards the light. “You feeling better?”

“Yeah.” Piper chuckles wryly. “I think so.”

“Good enough to go back to your friends?” Pause, and a sheepish little, half-grin. _“After_ we exchange info, I mean.”

“I'm... not really sure I should,” Piper admits, and clears her throat. “I think I made a bit of scene, storming after you like I did.”

Blue eyes her curiously. “As in you spilled your drink on someone?”

“Uh.” Piper spends a moment sucking at her teeth. “Well...”

“Piper...” She is getting a definite _look_ from those eyes. “What did you do?”

Gee, that dumpster over there is interesting. “I... might've poured my drink over Amy's head.”

There's a full five seconds of complete silence while Blue stares at her, and then she starts laughing so hard that Piper has to catch her before she falls over. “Piper Wright!”

“Well, she was being a bitch!” Piper defends, even as she starts laughing too. “I figured I could at least give her something worth bitching about.”

“You're the writer, here!” Blue accuses. “You're supposed to use your _words_.”

“Oh, I used those, too.”

“Scrappy thing.” The words come on a snicker as she's tugged into another hug; one that's close and warm and _perfect_ , and comes with the brush of Blue's lips against her temple. “How the hell did I survive seven years without you?”

“I say we don't find out again,” Piper suggests into the soft leather, and feels that sturdy frame move in a soft chuckle. “Do you really have to go home?”

“Nah.” The grin becomes visible when Blue pulls back. “I'm a little old for curfews, y'know? I just gotta text my mom if I'm not gonna be home until oh-dark-hundred.”

“Awesome.” Piper smiles, and gives the jacket under her hands a little tug. “You gotten too old for sleepovers?”

She hasn't, as it turns out, and while the walk back to Piper's place takes about half an hour, they decide to take it anyway just because it gives them that much more time to work on catching up. It's not enough, of course, but it's a start, and the fact that Piper's mom is out somewhere with Danny means that they don't have to walk on their tippy-toes when they do get there, in spite of the night being well into the wee morning hours.

“Nice place,” Blue murmurs as she looks around, and then shakes her head when Piper gives her an odd look for how quiet she's being. “Sorry. Jesus; I feel like I'm a teenager sneaking in.”

“Well, you're only what; six months out of that age span?” Piper points out reasonably; shedding her outerwear and then plodding over to the kitchen in her socks to pull open the fridge. “Sneaking in something you did a lot of?”

Blue catches the airborne bottle of water with a little snort. “For a while, yeah.”

That makes Piper pause halfway through a swallow and study her. “I gotta say, Blue; you really never struck me as the rebellious type.”

“I'm not sure if that's a compliment, but I'm gonna take it as one,” is the answer to that, along with that tiny little smile from earlier.

Piper sips her water and spends a few seconds just studying her. “What aren't you telling me?”

Blue blinks, and cocks her head. “How do you know?”

“You may be seven years older than last I saw you, but your expressions haven't changed _that_ much,” Piper tells her, and leans back against the counter. “You gave that same, almost-smile at the pub earlier when Michelle warned you about burning out in your junior year.”

“Heh.” Blue takes a drink and leans against the counter next to her; aiming a thoughtful look at the ceiling. “Well, I wasn't sure if I should tell them that I just _finished_ my junior year.”

Piper snorts and shakes her head at the floor, because _of course_ she did. “So not surprised,” she mutters, and gives Blue a little nudge. “Braniac.”

“Scrapper.” The nudge is returned. “Not that I don't appreciate the defensive block, but seriously, Piper; you don't have to get yourself into trouble on my account. Y'know?”

“I know.” Piper takes another swig from her bottle, and nods. “I don't _have_ to.”

Blue's chuckle is low enough to almost be a vibration more than anything else. “You haven't gotten one bit less feisty since we were kids, have you?”

“Not really, no.” The bottle is empty, and so she screws the lid back on and drops it into the recycling bin. “I think I've just gotten more experienced at it.” She settles back against the corner and sends Blue a sidelong glance. “Nice bit of dancing around the original subject, by the way.”

“That's what _I've_ gotten more experienced at,” is the wry answer. “I'll tell you if you want, but if I'm tired at still 3 hours behind, I can only imagine how exhausted you are.”

Piper glowers at her. “Must you be so sensible?”

“I haven't figured out how to get around _that_ part yet,” is the dry reply. “But hey; think of it like Christmas. The sooner we fall asleep the sooner it'll get here, so get me some sheets, let me conk on the couch and I'll play 20 Questions with you first thing tomorrow morning, if you want.”

“Goofball.” Piper headbutts her gently in the shoulder, and takes the second, empty bottle when it's offered. “I don't think the couch is the best idea, Blue. My folks are gonna see that before they see any notes I leave 'em, and I'd rather not risk anyone losing a few years of their lives to fright.”

“Hm.” Blue seems to consider that, and looks around the both the great room and down the hall. “Text message?”

“They got out of the habit of bringing their phones on dates when I left for college, and since they usually leave them in their bedroom, no.”

“Guest room?”

“Hey.” She gives her a poke for that. “We agreed to a sleepover. I'm pretty sure we'll both fit in my full-size.”

That earns her a neatly quirked eyebrow, as well as a tiny tug at the corner of Blue's mouth. “Have you stopped kicking in your sleep?”

Piper blows a raspberry, but also bends over a small pad of sticky notes and writes a brief head's up that she has a friend staying the night. “I guess you'll find out.”

“Uh huh.” Those very blue eyes give her a narrow look. “I call outside of the bed. If I'm chancing the feet of fury, I'd at least like the option of a quick escape.”

“I say again: goofball.” She pulls the topmost sticky note free with a soft _sssht_ , and listens to Blue's footsteps pad along behind her own as she slips down the hall and sticks it onto her parent's bedroom door before opening her own. “Just for that, you're sleeping closer to the wall.”

“Oh, the humanity.”

It's a little weird after that, because while they still chat and it's as easy as it has been the whole evening, there's also something about changing in front of each other as adults that's just kind of awkward. The best way Piper finds to circumvent it is to slip off to the bathroom and let Blue do the same when she's done, though she waits for her to actually get _into_ bed because she has the vague feeling that making Blue have to crawl _over_ her probably wouldn't help matters.

The fact that Eric was quite possibly right... that's something to think about in the morning, so she firmly pushes the idea from her mind just in time for Blue to return, and exchanges a grin with her as they wiggle under the covers and kill the lights.

“Hey.”

“Mm?” There's little point in opening her eyes since she can't even see Blue, but that's probably a good thing since the heat from her body is distracting enough.

“I missed you too,” Blue murmurs into the darkness – already sounding half-asleep - and Piper covers the nearby hand with her own and listens to her breathing, and hopes that Blue can't hear her heart doing acrobatics in her chest.

It's July of 2003. Blue is 20 and Piper is 19, and that childhood crush never really went away.

 


	10. Chapter 10

Piper wakes up in the familiar surroundings of her own bedroom, and to the distinctly _un_ familiar feeling of a warm body curled around her back. It startles her enough to jolt her fully awake, at least, and then she remembers the preceding evening and feels another jolt – this time in her chest – when she sees the tanned arm curled around her above the covers and realizes exactly who is – from what she can tell – still sound asleep behind her.

 _Holy shit_.

The moment is so surreal that it's almost enough to make her head spin, but needs must. As such, she takes a hold of one wrist and tugs gently, and finds an exasperated, little smile when all it earns her is an irritated grunt and the arm just wrapping around her tighter.

“Hey,” she whispers, and feels a third jolt to her _gut_ when Blue grumbles and presses closer. Definitely time to get out of bed. “C'mon, Blue; let me up.”

“Co faire?” is the grumbled reply; for one, in French, and for another, low and near-unintelligible; all fairly decent signs that Blue probably isn't even awake.

 _Why_ , Piper translates - though searching through the hazy memories of a single summer takes a while – and she _really_ needs to get out of this entirely too comfortable position before her heart manages to beat its way out of her chest.

Carefully, she does so; extracting herself from her best friend's hold and even managing to do so without waking her up, which is a testament to either jet lag, Blue being a deep sleeper, or both. Everything feels a little less intense and on the border of something she doesn't want to put a name to when she's standing up (because sure, this is _Blue_ , but it's also a woman her own age who ticks _every single box_ in what Piper's usually attracted to), and maybe that's why she can bite back a snicker when she gets a good look at Blue in the light slipping in from behind the blinds, because _wow,_ her bedhead is as bad as it was when they were kids.

Piper's own probably isn't much better, so she runs her hands through her hair a few times to help settle it, and then grabs a few items of clothing before she quietly slips from the room and closes the door behind her. Down the hall, she can make out the sound of her mother and Danny talking while the TV murmurs in the background _,_ but she forgoes saying good morning and instead ducks into the bathroom; shedding her sleepwear and sticking herself under the coldest, possible shower.

 _Don't,_ she tells herself firmly as she washes. _Don't. Even. Fucking. Go there._

God damn it, it's _Blue_. Her first priority should be just getting to know her again; to learn all the little bits she missed about what makes her tick now and how she managed to work past all those old challenges that Piper remembers, because last night, the only thing that gave away how Blue worked as a child was the fact that Piper knew her at the time, and so recognizes even the tiniest of signs. Exactly how attracted she also happens to be to her is... interesting, to say the least, but _really_ not what she wants to focus on.

So she won't, she decides, and towels off briskly before dressing herself in jeans and a simple t-shirt and brushing her hair into some semblance of order. Just like that.

“Morning, kiddo,” her mom greets when Piper enters the great room; a call that's echoed by Danny from his place at the stove. “Welcome back to the land of the living.”

“Grr, argh.” Piper leans on the back of the couch to give her mom a kiss on the head, and then wanders over to place one to Danny's cheek before securing a glass and a container of milk. “You guys have a good date? And please, limit your answers to PG-13 stuff for the sake of my tender ears.” The matching chuckles are answer enough, and she pulls a face while she fills her glass and puts the milk away. “Never mind. Glad you had fun.”

“So who spent the night?” comes the question when she sits down next to her mom and turns half an ear to the news. “This wasn't one of these booty calls I keep hearing about, was it?”

Piper almost chokes on her milk, and really hopes that that particular thing doesn't become a habit. “Mom!”

“No, then?”

“Oh, my God, it is _way_ too early for this.”

“Piper, honey; it's 9 AM.”

“Parents and sex talks should never be mixed unless alcohol is part of the equation,” Piper mutters, and chances a swallow of milk that thankfully _isn't_ rudely interrupted. _“No,_ Mom. Christ.”

Her mother chuckles, and the sound is echoed faintly from the direction of the kitchen. “It _is_ someone I know though, right?”

Piper sighs. “Yes, Ma'am. She's just still sleeping.”

“Nah.” The answer to that comes around a yawn and in a voice very unlike her mother's, which is enough to make Piper snap her head around towards the hall and see Blue now entering; dressed and clearly with her hair brushed, but still in the shirt she borrowed to sleep in since the one from last night probably still looks like it needs a wash. “It's noon according to my body, which is already way later than normal.” She pauses about three steps beyond the doorway as if she's only now realized that there are two other people in the room, and then raises one hand with a small, halfway-shy smile. “Uh, morning?”

Her mother, Piper thinks as she hides a smile of her own behind her glass, looks vaguely like she's seen a ghost, because even seven years on, there's no mistaking her best friend for anyone else. “Morning, Blue. Sleep okay?”

Blue quirks a half-grin her way. "I did; thanks. Your mom kinda looks like she's about to pass out, though."

"Oh, my word." That seems to be enough to draw Piper's mom from her stupor, though the stunned expression stays on her face as she gets to her feet, crosses the room and catches Blue by the shoulders. "Liza Fitzroy, as I live and breathe."

"Delaurant now, actually," is the mild correction, with Blue chuckling as she's pulled into a hug and returns it. "You look good, Ms. Wright."

"Honey, you are way past old enough to call me Kayla," Piper's mom scolds, and pulls back enough that she can look _up_ at Blue's face. "My, you grew some, didn't you?"

"Yes, Ma'am; sure did." Blue's expression is somewhere between pleased and mildly embarrassed, and she ducks her head a fraction while she tucks her hair behind her ear with a smile. "Never in as sudden spurts as I did that one year, and it seemed to stop completely about a year ago, thankfully."

"So you're the infamous Blue, huh?" is Danny's comment as he wanders over.

"I'd hope infamous isn't the word for it," Blue demurs as she shakes his hand.

Danny chuckles in response. "Well, maybe not." He settles a hand on Piper's shoulder, and she's blushing before he even speaks again. "You have been sorely missed by this one, though."

Blue just smiles. "If it's half as much as I've missed her, I'll count myself lucky."

The three of them chat for a few moments longer, and Piper just watches them; slowly downing her milk and feeling this really weird sense of completely undeserved accomplishment. Then, however, the older generation retreats to the kitchen to finish breakfast – or brunch, at this rate – and Blue plops down in couch next to her.

And smacks her knee. “Dude! You didn't tell your mom _who_ was sleeping over?” she hisses softly.

“I wanted to see her face when she recognized you,” Piper shrugs, though her words are trembling around the laugh she's trying to hold back. “Totally worth it.”

“Brat.” Blue rolls her eyes, but while she's doing a good job of _sounding_ mad, she's doing a damn shit one at looking it. “Well, I guess I shouldn't talk. I didn't tell my mom who I was staying with, either.”

“Brat,” Piper returns, and smirks at the narrow glare. “So I get to be on the receiving end of that too, huh?”

“Fair is fair.” There's another touch to her knee, though this is a pat rather than a smack. “On that note, wanna come over for lunch? I promise to make sure my mom isn't holding anything sharp before I show her who I brought.”

“Goofball.”

\---•♥•---

The invitation given to Piper ends up being aimed at her folks as well over breakfast, and is happily accepted. Blue _does_ warn her mother, but sneaky thing that she is, she does so by way of a text message that simply says _Got 3 who wanna join us for lunch. Okay?_

The answer, however, makes Piper laugh until she has to sit down.

_3 who eat like you and the boys, or 3 who eat like me? We're fresh out of elephant chops._

“Yeah, yeah; very funny,” Blue grumbles, but still smiles as she sends back an answer: _1 of the former and 2 of the latter_.

“I'm guessing I'm the 1,” Piper comments wryly; peering over Blue's shoulder. “You really think I eat as much as you do? I watched you pack those eggs away.”

“You look like you'd have to, to keep those guns fueled,” Blue tells her with a little squeeze to her arm.

_That's fine, half-pint. Saves me the trouble of emptying out Costco._

Piper snickers again. “I guess you come by your smartassery honestly,” she decides. “This really isn't how I remember your mom, though.”

“Well, you _were_ 12 last you saw her,” Blue notes with smirk. “Both her and dad are changing along with me and the boys; less parents and more friends as we get older.”

“Holy shit, the _boys,”_ Piper breathes, and calls up metal images of the little tykes she knew. “They're what; 13 and 14 now?”

“Uh-huh, and already about your height.” There's a faux-consoling, little pat to her shoulder. “Sorry, short stuff.”

“Bite me.” Piper elbows her in the side, and then gets to her feet to secure their jackets since they've decided that while her mom and Danny are out shopping for something to bring, Blue and her will go over early; on foot, since Blue's mom apparently lives right across the river in Charlestown, just off Park. “I still can't believe I haven't run into your mom, Blue. She really been here three years?”

“Just about.” Blue catches her jacket when Piper tosses it her way, and shrugs into it. “She was in NYC for years before that, but got a transfer offer to here in late 2000 and took it. Damn good thing, too.”

Piper slips into her own jacket, and tugs her hair free. “You mean 9/11?”

“Mmhm.” Blue bends to tug her boots on, but keeps speaking softly. “She worked in the South Tower until she moved, and her and the boys lived a few blocks from Ground Zero.” She straightens, then, and smiles slightly. “Never in my life been as glad to have my mom further away as I was that day.”

“Jesus,” Piper hisses. “Yeah, I bet. You weren't with her?”

A shake of the pale head. “No. I... didn't take the divorce well,” Blue admits, and ducks her head. “I basically blamed her, and chose to go with my dad.”

“Jacob and Michael went with your mom, then?”

“Mm.” Blue slips out when Piper holds the door for her, and leans on the wall while Piper locks up. “It sucked splitting apart like that, but it was probably for the best. Jacob and I weren't doing too well with each other.”

“You are now, though?”

“Oh, yeah.” That, with smile. “Nothing like getting your head on straight to make you appreciate your family.”

“Hm.” Piper hooks their arms as they start walking, and pockets her key. “Are we moving into that long story you mentioned last night?”

“I didn't call it that.”

“You didn't have to.” She tightens her hold a little, and feels Blue chuckle. “I'm guessing it has something to do with how angry you were getting with yourself back before you guys moved?”

That earns her a hesitant, sidelong glance. “Was I really that obvious?”

Piper eyes her. “To someone who knew you as well I did back then? Oh, yeah.”

“I guess subtlety was never one of my strengths,” Blue muses. “But yeah. It was pretty bad when we left, and only got worse. St. Isidore's helped some, but with Jacob still mad at me and then my parents splitting up... I was basically convinced that the whole thing was my fault.” Piper takes a breath to argue, but the arm wrapped around her own tightens briefly, and that's enough. “Then, when you and I lost touch... well. I ended up getting expelled, actually,” she notes, and sounds somewhere between ashamed and amused. “That was a first.”

They wind their way down the semi-crowded sidewalk towards the Charles River, and Piper tries to connect the dots from the quiet, studious girl she knew, onto a troublemaker of enough caliber to get _expelled_ , and then onto the confident, relaxed woman walking next to her.

Something isn't computing.

“Damn, Blue,” she ends up muttering “What the hell did you do?”

“To get expelled?” is the question, and Piper nods. “Well. First, in a school that's pretty much exclusively for really smart kids with little to no social skills, there is plenty of chances for some of them to turn into wily, little punks.” There's a wry look, and Blue indicates herself briefly. “They work to prevent that, of course, but again, _really smart kids_. They never did figure out that I was the one who had the everything printed come out in French that one semester, for instance; at least not that I've ever heard.”

Piper starts laughing so hard that she almost trips over her own feet. “You didn't!”

“Oh, I did.” Blue chuckles. “I was a clever, little brat with a chip on my shoulder the size of New England, and way too much time on my hands.”

“Huh.” Piper bumps her with one shoulder. “But if they never found that out, that wasn't what you got expelled for.”

“No,” comes the agreement. “That was for--” Blue pauses and sighs, and then starts again. “You ever notice how people tend to kinda be drawn to other people who are in the same, emotional state? Happy with happy and so forth?”

“Sure.”

“I wasn't the only one pissed off at the world and myself at St. Isidore's,” Blue says. “Though I _was_ the youngest in the group I ended up with; most of them were a year or two older. We'd... y'know, do small stuff like cut a class or not show up for school at all, but we'd also do stuff like vandalism, or shoplift, or get into fights.” She huffs softly. “And it's really hard for the psychiatric staff to help you out when you never show up for your appointments.”

Piper watches her quietly. “Your dad couldn't take you to those?”

“Not if I gave him the slip in advance,” is the low mutter. “Sneaking out – or in, sometimes – was something I got really good at. So was lying convincingly and keeping my stories straight.”

She really has no idea what to say to that, or if she even should say anything to begin with. “So what was the final straw at St. Isidore's?”

“Getting arrested.” There's a small pause. “Weekly, pretty much. Woulda been more if I hadn't managed to run off or hide as often as I did.” Blue gives a random pebble a little kick. “I was 15 at the time, so juvenile records, thankfully.”

“Wow,” Piper murmurs. “I guess my little snark about not really seeing you as the rebellious type has been thoroughly disproved.”

Blue snorts. “Wish it had been for a better cause than me just being a little shit who couldn't see past the end of my nose, though.”

“Hey.” Piper bumps her again. “You were _15_ , Blue. Everyone's a little shit at that age.”

“Mm, maybe.” Blue bumps her back. “But yeah; expelled. And hauled into the local precinct enough times in the interim where my folks tried to a find a different school that my dad eventually told the cops to leave me there overnight.”

 _That_ makes Piper start. “He _what?!”_

“Means to an end,” is the dismissive reply, along with a little wave of Blue's free hand. “He was hoping the experience would scare me straight, and I gotta say, it worked; even if it also pissed me off enough to change my last name.”

"Blue." Piper curls her fingers around the elbow in her hold, and tugs until they both come to a halt and Blue is facing her. "He _left you in jail_ overnight."

"Piper." In the same tone, but softer. "I was heading in down a path that would have landed me in jail for _real,_ and sneaking off before anything he could think of to help me. I _needed_ that dose of reality."

That's a frightening - and more than just a little surreal - thought; that her best friend was so far down the line towards self-destruction that her parents could see no other way to shake some sense into her.

"Christ," is all she mutters, however, and falls into step when Blue starts moving again. "So what happened after that?"

"We moved," is the answer. "All the way to Oregon, which was certainly a clean slate. I spent a year being tutored at home instead of going to an actual school, and saw a therapist three times a week for the first six months." They pause at an intersection, and Blue cocks her head at the red light. "I got really into music as a way of handling my emotions; mostly in terms of listening to it, but I learned to play... five instruments? The drums are my favorite, though."

"You still going to therapy?"

"Mm." A nod. "Only about once every six weeks, though. More regular appointments are hell on a college schedule."

That, she has to chuckle at. "When doing an undergrad in CompSci and Art at the same time? I believe you.” A taxi zooms by. “You started at UCLA when you were what; 17?"

"Yup." The light changes, and they start moving again. "Almost didn't, though. It took several visits and all kinds of tests before my folks agreed to let me go; especially since I wanted to go alone."

"To Los Angeles." Piper stares at the river as they cross it, and tries to imagine moving that far on her own at that age. "You've got guts, Blue; that's for sure."

"It's probably more cussedness than anything else," is the wry answer. "I wanted to prove that they could trust me, and I _did_ spend the first semester in a dorm, so I wasn't completely alone."

"But it worked out?"

"Not the dorm bit, but yeah," Blue agrees. "Being around that many people was just... too loud. Too much going on at all hours, and it was kinda driving me nuts. So over Christmas, dad helped me find an off campus apartment, and I moved in there. Got a car so I could drive to class, and took up surfing since I was close to the beach anyway and it beat the hell out of staring at the ceiling."

Piper chews her lip for a few seconds, but eventually decides to ask. "You pay your own way?"

“Yup.” Another nod, and a small, sideways smile. “I coulda gotten a scholarship, but why take it away from someone who needs it?”

“No, I mean...” Piper sighs and pinches the bridge of her nose. “Do _you_ pay your own way? Or do your folks?”

She gets another sideways look for that, but this one is more considering than amused. “Figured out I'm not exactly middle class, huh?”

“Jesus, Blue--”

“Can I pick one, or do I have to be both?”

“Smartass.” Piper gives her a nudge. “I knew you guys were well-off _before_ you invited me to across the country on your parents' dime, thanks.”

Blue chuckles and watches her own feet for a moment. “I pay my own way,” she then murmurs. “Much as I dislike the term 'trust fund', I got limited access to mine when I turned 18. Set, monthly payments that I can have raised if need be as long as my parents approve it, but easily enough for rent and utilities and such. Tuition payments and necessities like car repairs and medical bills are automatically pre-approved; everything else, I save up for out of what I get each month.”

“Hm.” Piper lets her hand slip down to catch Blue's and twines their fingers. “Do I even want to know what your net worth is?”

“Eh.” Blue pulls a face. “Probably not.”

Good enough. Piper isn't sure if Blue is simply uncomfortable telling, but it's not like the answer matters to her anyway; if she's happy and able to make ends meet, that's all Piper cares about.

“Fair warning, though,” Blue then says, and gives her hand a squeeze. “I owe you seven birthday- _and_ Christmas presents.”

“No, you don't.” Piper gives her a look. “You're back in my life; that's all I want.” It's clear from the quirked eyebrow that Blue isn't convinced, so Piper bumps her with her hip this time as they turn a corner and find themselves on a side road lined with large, private villas. _“Don't._ Just keep in touch; alright?”

“Hmph.” It's clear that Blue isn't happy with that, but she nods and then leads them up a walkway to a particular house. “Okay. At least e-mail's gonna make that easier, since we're gonna be on opposite coasts in a few months.”

“Blech.” Piper is the one to grimace this time. “Don't remind me.”

“'Kay.” Blue nudges her off to the side so she's out of view front the front door, and Piper watches in amusement as she then opens it and sticks her head inside. “Hey! Anybody home?”

“Duh?” is the answer from inside; one of the boys, clearly, but the voice has dropped enough that Piper can't tell which one. “We've been waiting for you all day, numbskull.”

The pale eyes roll, and Piper snickers when Blue mouths a single word to her – _brothers_ – before crooking her finger at whoever she's talking to, and then holding it to her lips in a shushing motion. “Where's mom?” she then asks them, much softer.

“... making lunch?” is the answer, as though that should be obvious. “Mikey's helping out. What'd you do, sis?”

“Just get out here,” Blue hisses; catching a bare, tanned wrist and tugging outside who Piper _knows_ by now to be Jacob, except this Jacob isn't a little boy but a _young man_ with broadening shoulders and a _jawline_ and _peach fuzz_ and _when did that happen?_

“What f-- hey!” Jacob yelps when he almost trips over the step at the second yank, but catches himself and gives his sister a shove. “Watch it, Arnold. Where's the damn f--” He catches sight of her, then, and Piper leans against the wall and feels her head spin a little while those brown eyes widen and she waggles her fingers at him.

“Piper?” That in a hushed, barely audible whisper, and when Piper nods, Jacob's grin pretty much takes over his whole face. “ _Holy fucking shit!”_

“Five bucks and counting,” Blue teases as she nudges the front door closed, but Jacob isn't even listening; instead pretty much _tackling_ Piper into a hug that makes her eyes sting and her cheeks ache from smiling so widely.

Being _picked up_ and hugged – since Jacob is maybe half an inch shy of her own height – is starting to seem like a family thing.

“Good to see you too, Jakey,” she chuckles; catching Blue's eyes from over his shoulder and smiling what looks like that same, weird feeling of accomplishment she felt herself. “Man, you got big!”

“Yeah; no kidding.” He grins in the crooked way that she's already gotten re-familiarized with thanks to his sister. “Mom says I'm outgrowing my clothes every month right now.”

“Mikey isn't far behind,” Blue notes dryly. “Both of 'em will be taller than dad in two years, at this rate.”

“And taller than _you_ by Christmas, probably.”

“Probably," is the answer. "But the bit you'll grow taller than me won't see much use, anyway."

Piper shoves down a snicker, and Jacob rolls his eyes. "Something, something, you're taller than Piper," he grumbles, and exchanges elbow jabs with his sister. "So are we doing a 'freak mom out' sort of thing?"

"That's the plan," Blue nods. "Can I get you to run interference and get Mikey out here first?"

"On it." Jacob slips back into the house after a smart salute, and Piper gives Blue a look and shakes her head.

"Your poor mother."

The grin she gets in response is completely unrepentant. "Nah. She's used to it."

"With the three of you around? I believe it." She teeters a little at the playful push, and chuckles. "Hey; no hating on the messenger."

"Phhbt."

Piper is halfway to a really ill-advised quip about not sticking that thing out unless she intends to use it, but is saved by the bell. Or rather, by the front door opening and Michael now poking his head out. He's maybe two inches behind Jacob in terms of height and as fair as Blue, but while he definitely looks more like a boy than a man, the changes are still numerous and enough to make Piper's heart ache at how much she has clearly missed.

"Holy cow!" He, at least, won't be fined for his language, Piper thinks with a grin as she catches him, and watches Blue grab the door before it can slam shut behind him. "How did Liza find you?!"

Blue chuckles. "She found me, actually."

"By pure chance," Piper points out wryly. "No other explanation for us happening to be in the same place at the same time, and me happening to glance in the right direction."

 _"Please_ can I be there when mom sees you?" Michael begs. "She's gonna flip!"

That's the second mention of something like that in roughly as many minutes, so Piper sends Blue a questioning look. “Good kind of 'flip', right?”

“Oh, yeah,” is the amused reply. “I think she and dad tried about as hard as I did to figure out which 'Piper Wright' was you once the Internet happened.”

“Guys!” Michael doesn't stomp his foot, but he gives a very good impression of wanting to do just that. “You can talk _later_. Let's get to the part about making mom freak from being happy, already!”

“Okay, okay; hold your metaphorical horses.” Blue ruffles his hair in exchange for a glower, and smiles. “Let's go, then. Piper?”

“That's me.”

“Be veeeewy quiet.”

“Goof.” Piper pokes her in the side, but does drop her voice when the door is pulled open again. “Are we hunting wabbits?”

“Nah,” Blue whispers back, and pokes the tip of her tongue out through a grin when Michael covers his mouth to hold back a giggle. “Mothers. Much more wascally.”

“Apple didn't fall far from that tree, did it?”

“Shh.” She's nudged through the front entryway and then though the massive living room beyond, with her taking care to walk as quietly as possible while Blue and her brother take no such precautions. “Mom? You in earshot?”

“In the kitchen, half-pint,” is the predictable answer, and Piper agreeably comes to a stop to the side of the wide doorway - out of sight - while Michael enters fully and Blue leans against the wooden jamb. “I didn't think you'd be here until our guests showed up.”

“I'm full of surprises,” Blue jokes, and Piper rolls her eyes because ain't _that_ the truth. “You'll never guess what I found last night.”

“Uh huh.” There's the sound of something being dropped into the sink. “Please don't tell me it was another game console.”

“Way more entertaining than that; promise.” A hand curls around her arm and tugs lightly, and Piper takes a breath and follows. “Gives much better hugs, too.”

“Honey, what on earth are y--” Anna turns just as Piper steps into view, and promptly drops the peeler she was holding.

Piper is very aware of how quiet the entire room is, and feels herself flush while Anna stares at her – sort of like she's seen a ghost, like Piper's mom did at Blue earlier – and Blue, Jacob and Michael all grin like cats that got the cream. “Hi, Mrs. D.”

“Oh--” Three steps. “-- my--” Hands on her shoulders. “--God.” Anna's voice is trembling, but the hug Piper is pulled into is almost as tight as the one she shared with Blue the night before. She's shorter, Piper notes somewhere in the corner of her mind – or, more likely, Piper is taller – and has a little gray in her hair while her body and face has gotten a fraction rounder, but she smells and sounds exactly like she did seven years ago. “Oh, _Piper._ Honey, let me look at you.”

Obligingly, Piper lets herself be held at arm's length; holding still while Anna marvels over how grown up she apparently looks – _You got so tall! Oh, and look at that smile; just like your mother's!_ \- and probably not losing her blush by even one iota, if the amused grin she's getting from Blue's general direction is anything to go by.

“You--” Anna then tells her with a smile and a clasp of her hands. “-- _must_ be the 'one' mentioned in that very mysterious text I got earlier. You certainly look like you need some fuel to keep yourself looking like that.”

“Yes, Ma'am; Blue said pretty much the same thing,” Piper agrees with a sheepish grin. “The other two would be my mom and her boyfriend, Danny. They'll be here in an hour or so.”

Anna stares at her for a moment, and then turns enough that she can aim a mock-glare and one very accusing, maternal finger at her daughter. “You, half-pint--”

“-- are full of surprises?” Blue guesses hopefully; clearly biting back a grin as her mother simply tsks and hugs her.

She looks _way_ too pleased with herself when Anna returns to lunch prep, so Piper gives her a look as she wanders over and pokes her in the stomach. It's pretty much hard as a rock. “You're trouble, Blue.”

Blue starts laughing. “Oo, chér; you just said a mouthful.”

\---•♥•---

The summer practically flies by, which Piper doesn't find particularly fair. It also really annoys her that classes at UF start much earlier than they do at UCLA, because although her and Blue don't spend _every_ day together, it still feels kind of like being cheated out of sorely missed time. Blue comes with when Piper's parents drive her to Boston Logan for the flight south, at least, which adds an hour or so that still goes way quicker than she wants it to.

She tries not to bitch, though. They _are_ adults now, and losing time face to face is just a part of that; especially with the two of them in colleges on opposite sides of the country. E-mail, at least, is much faster than snail mail, and adding to that the fact that their moms have also reconnected, there is little to no chance of losing touch again.

The long, full-body hug she gets before the security check – _don't you dare vanish on me again, Piper Wright_ – stays with her the entire five or so hours it takes before her plane lands in Gainesville, and she swears that she can still smell Blue's scent on her shirt when she's done the barest of settling into her new dorm; this year with a new roommate whose schedule is so opposite her own that they'll probably see each other once a week during daylight hours, at most.

That's alright, though. At least it means that when Piper boots up her laptop and sees the e-mail waiting for her, there are no witnesses to the absolutely stupid grin that takes over her face.

**From: e.a.d@hotmail.com – 12:11 PM  
** _Hey,_

_So I know that you already have all this written down and entered and whatnot, but paper gets washed or torn or chucked out by mistake while electronics break, and with how important my contact information clearly is to you (anything over 10 mentions is obsessing, missy), I figured I'd send it to you here, too. E-mail is a little more difficult to accidentally lose, what with servers and all._

_E. A. Delaurent  
_ _130 San Vicente Blvd, Apt. 146-E  
_ _Santa Monica, CA, 90402_

_310-434-3907_

_Or just write me here, which is infinitely faster._

_Be safe (that means no getting munched on by gators in the Floridian wilderness, in case you're wondering)._

_//Blue_

“Gators,” Piper sighs, and chuckles as she gives the signoff an affectionate, little wipe with the pad of her finger. “I miss you already, you colossal goof.”

It's August of 2003. Blue and Piper are separated again, but this time it's on _their_ terms, and that makes all the difference in the world.

 


	11. Chapter 11

It's remarkably easy, adjusting her life at UF to also include time spent talking to Blue; even if their 'talks' are basically just a flurry of short e-mails flying between east and west.

The time difference actually works out nicely; with three hours between them, Piper has that long to study before Blue's classes let out, and Blue has the same amount of time after Piper goes to bed. Not that they spam each other on a daily basis; both of them have other things to do, whether those are late classes, labs, or – at least in Piper's case - evenings out with friends or part-time, retail jobs for extra spending money. In spite of that, however, they eventually work out a schedule that has them focusing on each other either two or three nights a week; something that turns out to cause improvements in study habits for both of them.

By October, there are enough tests looming close enough that Piper is still studying even when she's also e-mailing back and forth with Blue. It's not as effective as concentrated studying but it still works, and damn if she's going to give up time that's still spent getting to re-know her best friend. It's not like Blue is waiting for her replies with bated breath as it is, since she usually working too; albeit on vastly different subjects.

It feels almost like they're back to the level they were at as kids. Eerily so, really, since the one, major thing that Piper still hasn't fessed up to is the fact that she isn't exactly heterosexual. Part of it is because as accepting as Blue is – and _was_ , when they were kids – sometimes people change and homophobia is anything but a dystopian nightmare. Part of it is because the subject just hasn't come up; Blue hasn't mentioned an interest in or attraction to anyone – in her day to day life or on the silver screen – and Piper hasn't either because the one person she's by far the most attracted to is Blue herself.

Mostly, though, she frankly doesn't know how to bring it up. If she explains her sexuality and Blue is – as she expects – completely accepting, chances are that the first question aimed her way will be who she's got her eye on, which... ah, no. Awkward. Especially since the attraction will... maybe not _go away_ , but fade to a more manageable level if Piper just gives it some time.

So until then, mum's the word.

“ _You've got mail!”_

“Speak of the devil,” Piper mutters, and takes a sip from a gently steaming mug before switching to the correct window. Blue has been quiet for twenty or so minutes – coding or drawing, presumably – and Piper scrolls down to check her own, latest message to catch herself back up since she's spent the last while up to her ears in a paper on photojournalism.

**From: pwright84@mail.com - 8:31 PM  
** _I keep telling you, I'm not a dude. For a native New Englander, you sure do talk (or type) like a proper, SoCal surfergirl._

_(Yes. You do too.)_

**From: e.a.d@hotmail.com - 8:54 PM  
** _if (DoToo > 0)_  
_DoNot();_  
_else_  
_Phhbt();  
_ _end_

_Thus: DO NOT!_

Okay, so that takes a little consideration, Piper privately admits, and spends a moment cocking her head at the screen before she starts typing back.

**To: e.a.d@hotmail.com – 8:58 PM  
** _So basically, any time I say 'do too', your response is 'do not', and if I don't say that and/or stop saying it, your response is a raspberry that finishes the conversation?_

**From: e.a.d@hotmail.com - 9:00 PM  
** _Phhbt._

_See, this is just one more reason why you're awesome. You figured that out in no time, while way too many others can't tell the difference between a computer and a monitor. [worries intensely for the future of humanity]_

“There's a full-time job,” Piper chuckles, and clicks the new e-mail that shows up almost immediately.

**From: e.a.d@hotmail.com – 9:01 PM  
** _Dude, /please/ tell me you have a webcam. If yes (or no, even), kindly go forth, download and install:_ [ _http://www.skype.com_ ](http://www.skype.com/)

**To: e.a.d@hotmail.com - 9:03 PM  
** _Still not a dude, Blue._

**From: e.a.d@hotmail.com – 9:06 PM  
** _Trust me, chér; I know._

_Now GO FORTH, DOWNLOAD AND INSTALL, WOMAN. FFS._

**From: e.a.d@hotmail.com - 9:07 PM  
** _It just occurred to me that E.A.D could conceivably stand for Eat A Dick._

Piper almost snorts her tea.

**To: e.a.d@hotmail.com - 9:10 PM  
** _Goof. I went, I examined, and I'm downloading in spite of my distinct lack of a webcam. Give me the highlights?_

**From: e.a.d@hotmail.com - 9:15 PM  
** _New program that a from-abroad classmate of mine is currently raving over on the class massage board; lets you do voice-only or voice/video calls over your Internet connection, but also has an IM/chat function._

_Public release was a little over a month ago. You create an account, and people add you via your username. Not much new in that part._

**To: e.a.d@hotmail.com - 9:18 PM  
** _Well, the calling thing won't be happening at the moment since I'm woefully short both a camera and a microphone. I'm guessing video calls are heavy transfers, so data caps and slow speeds probably aren't things you worry about?_

**From: e.a.d@hotmail.com - 9:25 PM  
** _D... arlin' (remembered this time!), I do compsci, and it's called /Information/ Technology for a reason. Once the option was there, I asked permission from my landlord to have a dedicated T1 line installed. Hell if I can get anything done online with the building's standard of 56k these days._

_You can't tell me that a university dorm runs on less than at least several megs, right? What are your speeds like?_

_(And have you created an account yet?)_

**To: e.a.d@hotmail.com - 9:28 PM  
** _Patience, Grashopper; the installation is still running. Just pass yours on and I'll add you as soon as I can, alright?_

_My speeds are okay right now; I think around 300k or so. Your landlord didn't lose his mind? I'd think having a new line added would at least include a few holes in the walls._

**From: e.a.d@hotmail.com - 9:30 PM** _  
I paid for the whole thing including patching up, so he didn't care. Adds more value to the place once I move out._

_As for my username, I can no longer look at my own initials without seeing 'Eat A Dick', so it's 'e-b.a.d'. Very fitting for the Internet Age, right?_

Piper shakes her head at the screen and smiles. Elizabeth 'Blue' Angelique Delaurant, obviously, is what it stands for, and it's weirdly heartwarming how much Blue clearly likes that old nickname; especially since she's never let anyone else use it, and seems to prefer letting it be something that only Piper can call her.

That thought is all too enjoyable, though, and so she pushes it away to instead focus on the newly completed installation; starting up the program, working her way through the sign-up screens and chuckling at how even _this_ is largely blue. A web camera and microphone is something she needs to put on her list of things to buy when possible, because although IM'ing is a little more practical than e-mailing, it hasn't yet proved enough of a difference on its own to make them move to that.

Actually being able to hear Blue's voice or see her face, though; and _without_ the hassle of long distance charges? That's a carrot if Piper's ever heard of one. So she lets the program log her in and bring up a few welcome and how-to screens, and obligingly scans them before clicking them shut and sending off a contact request.

It isn't a resource-heavy application going by the sound of her laptop's fan, though she's willing to bet that an actual video call will probably eat up a good chunk of her memory. She isn't nearly as technically proficient as Blue is – for one, writing a program? Nah; better to do a story or an article – but the first thing Piper does with any new machine she gets her hands on is to familiarize herself with it, because damn if she doesn't want to be able to fix her own problems.

So they move from e-mail to IM, and aside from typing and reading, Piper buries herself in settings and FAQs.

\---•♥•---

It probably shouldn't surprise her to find a package waiting for her in the commons area a few days later; her address is hardly unknown, after all. All the same, it still sort of catches her off guard since she isn't expecting anything, but it's there and very obviously has her name on it, so Piper takes it after showing her student ID and carts it upstairs and into her room under one arm.

Isabella isn't in right now either, so there is no one around to see her unwrap the innocuous, brown paper and blink at the contents as she tries to figure out how to react.

 _QuickCam Pro 5000_ , the box proclaims innocently; white letters on a blue-green background with a small blurb in the lower, right corner that boasts about an included headset. The camera itself is proudly displayed by the clear plastic at the top, with the Logitech logo front and center.

“Why do I have the feeling I know where you came from?” she asks of it; separating the box from the wrapping and finding an envelope underneath; addressed to her in a familiar, slanting script. “Aha.”

_Hey,_

_I know; you told me not to worry about missed birthday- and Christmas presents._

“That I did, Blue.”

_That isn't what this is. I'm not sure how I know – some sort of hazy recollection from way back when, maybe - but I get the feeling that you don't really like to accept others doing for you what you can do for yourself._

Piper grunts softly and sits down on her bed; eyeing the letter wryly. “Yeah, probably true.”

_I get that. Unfortunately, I'm also an impatient little shit who hates having to wait for a solution when I know I can provide one._

“I get _that_ ,” she mutters in response. “Still don't want you throwing your money at me, though.”

_Maybe try not to think of it as a gift? It's really a matter of me very selfishly wanting to be able to see your face and hear your voice outside of the occasional break from school, and realizing that I can make that happen a lot sooner. It's not like I can't afford it._

“That is not the point, young lady.”

_I know; probably not the point. But this is an issue I can fix, and I figured I'd at least chance it since the worst possible end result is you sending it back (which you're free to do, of course; I've included something that'll let you do that on my dime, since I sent it without asking), and me still not getting to see you until you buy a webcam on your own time._

_I really hope you'll accept this one, though._

Piper lets the letter drop into her lap, and settles into the bed with her hands behind her head as she turns the problem over in her mind. On one hand, Blue is absolutely right that she doesn't like to accept handouts; having been brought up with the values of working for what she has – earning the fun things, as her mother once called it – and with the pride won from doing things herself.

On the other hand, Blue has been brought up with the very same mindset, with the only real difference being that she quite frankly has a far higher net worth than Piper due to her family being who they are; a net worth that'll probably only increase when she turns 21 and her trust fund is fully turned over to her. Piper hasn't asked again exactly what that net worth is, but she _has_ managed to infer from their conversations that Blue could probably live a perfectly comfortable life without working a single day, if she so chose.

The fact that her best friend has every intention of being a productive member of society once she graduates, of course, only makes her all the more attractive. Damn it.

On the third hand – Piper gives the ceiling a wry look and sighs a little – since Blue's financials are what they are, she also has both the funds and the inclination to help out when she can. And really, would Piper do any different if the situation was reversed?

Not a chance, she decides, and hefts the box enough that she can look at the camera without getting up.

“She and I are going to talk about this,” she tells it, and turns it over so she can read the text on the back. “But I guess you're staying with me.”

 


	12. Chapter 12

Video calls are a new thing, but definitely something that Piper can get used to; even if the image is basically a tiny window maybe a sixth the size of her monitor if she wants Blue to look anything like a human being instead of a gaggle of pixels. They can't always _do_ a video call – it's only really possible when everyone else at UF isn't online for research or whatever – but while they have to plan those and sometimes work through a few minutes of trial and error to get them running, it's infinitely better than not having them at all.

Voice calls are easier; probably because transferring audio isn't nearly as data heavy as transferring video. Those, therefore, happen whenever both of them have the time and last anywhere from five minutes to several hours, since Blue lives on her own and Piper effectively does too, with how rarely she sees her roommate.

They do talk about the Blue-buying-her-camera-thing, though it isn't until Piper's been using it for well over a week; mostly because she feels like bringing it up first thing would maybe come off as a little too aggressive.

“It's _your_ money,” Piper insists; as gently as she can because Blue is sitting there with her arms crossed over her tank-top covered chest and her brow lowered in a scowl.

“Exactly,” is the answer. “Which means that it's mine to spend as I see fit to, right?”

“Right.” She sighs and curls her hands around her mug; closing her eyes and inhaling the warm scent of blackberries. “I'm just not sure how comfortable I am with the fact that you use it to spoil _me.”_

There's a little silence, and Piper glances up to see Blue watching her pensively. “I think you and I have very different definitions of what constitutes 'spoiling',” Blue says at length, and gives her own, lower lip a little tug. “Piper, the camera was barely a hundred dollars. Spoiling you woulda been tossing a few grand around to have someone hand-build a new, top-of-the-line laptop with an _integrated_ webcam.” A pause, and a brief twitch of her lips that's almost too small for the camera to catch. “Which... admittedly, the idea crossed my mind more than once.”

“Your restraint is commendable,” Piper tells her dryly.

“I know, right?” Blue waits exactly as long as it takes for Piper to roll her eyes, and then sighs. “Look, I get that me spending money on you is something that makes you uncomfortable,” she admits softly; settling her elbows on her desk and leaning forward until the camera can bring her features into sharper relief. “What I don't get is _why_. If I was funneling every cent I own into... I dunno, silk sheets and platinum furniture, then yeah, sure; overkill. But all I've done is buy you _one thing_ , and one that benefits _both_ of us.”

“I know.” Piper takes a mouthful of tea and focuses on that for a few seconds as she tries to center her thoughts. “And I appreciate it; you know that, right?”

“Mm.” Blue settles her head in her hands, and Piper can see her eyes flick from the camera to her own monitor. “So why is the whole thing still wigging you out?”

Piper lifts her mug in a little half-toast, and quirks an eyebrow. “That's what I'm trying to figure out.”

“Ah.” There's a small frown, and then Blue purses her lips to hold a pen between them and her nose. “Pfelb me whub ur phnkin'?”

Say what? “Any chance I can have that in English?”

“Sorry.” Blue chuckles, and removes the pen to instead twirl it lazily between her fingers. “Tell me what you're thinking.”

“How do you mean?” Piper sips her tea again, and watches the blueish glow of the screen reflect off of Blue's eyes. “Like, word for word?”

“Running commentary, yeah; pretty much.” A nod, and a half-grin. “That's what I do when I'm trying to figure stuff out, anyway; list what I'm thinking out loud,” Blue explains, and winks. “Another reason to live alone. Less chance of being carted off to the nuthouse.”

“'Less'?”

“Well, I still have to remember to only do it at home,” is the halfway-sheepish admission. “I _have_ had to pretend to be rehearsing lines when I've accidentally done it in public.”

Piper has to bite the rim of her mug to keep from laughing. “LA would be the place for that, I guess.”

Blue cocks her head. “For fake-running lines, or for being kinda nuts?”

“Yes.”

“Har har.” She gets a smirk, at least, and pretends not to see Blue scratch her nose with her middle finger in the most unsubtle way imaginable. “You think you're funny, huh?”

Piper shrugs. “You're the one laughing,” she points out, and tries really hard not to think about how this feels kind of like flirting.

“Don't let it go to that pretty little head of yours,” Blue teases, and then chuckles right in time with the heat that Piper can feel rising in her cheeks. “And don't skirt the subject, Ms. Wright. Your thoughts?”

“Jumbled,” Piper starts, and leans back in her seat with a frown. “Uncertain. I don't want to feel like I owe you, or you to feel like you have to buy me, but if I had the money and you didn't, I'd do what you're doing.”

“So your logic is fighting with your pride?” Blue hazards.

“Something like that.” She pulls a face even as she admits to it. “I'm a little too proud, sometimes.”

“Piper, you have every reason to be proud,” is the quiet answer. “You've earned everything you have, including your spot at UF. If my grades were still shit, I could've just _bought_ my way into wherever I wanted.” Blue pauses after that, and sits up a little while her gaze briefly turns inwards. “And that's turning the subject to myself. I'm sorry. I'm trying to learn how not to do that.”

That catches her attention. “Why?”

Blue opens her mouth, and then closes it again. “Why did I turn the subject to myself, or why am I trying to learn not to?”

“Either,” Piper decides, and pulls her feet up under herself. “Both, really. In whatever order.”

She gets a tiny smile for that. “That's definitely focusing on me, though. We were talking about you.”

“So lets talk about you instead and give my head a few minutes to get itself straightened out.” Piper settles back in her chair and adjusts her headset; perfectly content to sip her tea and learn something new about her best friend. “C'mon, Blue. You can't drop info like that and not expect me to get curious.”

“No; I guess not,” Blue assents; taking a breath and running a hand through her hair. “Okay, then; why do I turn conversations to me?” The question is a little lower as if she's speaking to herself more than to Piper; something that's only underlined by how her eyes flit off to the side and the sound of drumming fingers that travels across the connection. “I'm paraphrasing my therapist here, but basically, her theory is that I'm sort of overcompensating for not really knowing how to talk to others.”

“Wait; seriously?” Piper frowns at the screen, and lowers her hands and the mug she's holding into her lap. “You could've fooled me; sure looked like you knew what you were doing this summer--”

“Better than I did when we were kids?” Blue finishes wryly when Piper stops herself, and waits for her to nod before she shrugs. “Practice. You can learn how to fake anything, and to a certain extent even how to act as long as you study things like body language and voice inflection. You can't _turn_ yourself normal--” Her lips twitch a little. “-- but you can train yourself to do a pretty good job of pretending to be.”

Piper considers that; remembers how Blue was around others when they were kids, and feels her stomach drop like a rock in free fall. “Please don't tell me you're as uncomfortable around groups of strangers now as you were then.”

“Not _as,”_ is the halting answer. “But pretty close, yeah.”

“Shit.” She closes her eyes and covers them with one hand. “Blue, I _swear,_ if I'd known that--”

“You wouldn't have invited me into the pub with your friends that first night in Boston,” comes the gentle interruption. “I figured as much, which is why I didn't tell you at the time.”

“ _Why?”_ Piper sets her mug own – maybe a little harder than normal - and leans on the desk. “If you'd just _told me_ , I would have--”

“-- not asked?” Blue watches her quietly for a long moment; her fingers twining and her hands coming up to let her index fingers cross her lips while she settles her chin on her thumbs. “Let me leave, or left _with_ me in spite of the plans you had with your friends?”

“Yes!” she sputters. “Jesus Christ, Blue; in a friggin' heartbeat!”

“I didn't _want_ to make you do that,” is the low reply, followed by a crooked smile. “Me being an antisocial little twerp is no reason to pull you into it.”

“Blue...” Piper sighs and rubs at her temples. “I really hate the thought that you spent that long being uncomfortable just to hang out with me, okay?”

“Sure; okay.” That answer is unconcerned enough to make her look up. “As long as you're okay with the fact that I did it anyway because I _wanted_ to hang out with you without ruining your plans.” There's a long, direct look. “And that I'll do it again every chance I get.”

“But--”

“No.” Low and gentle, but firm. “Piper, I _missed you_. I would have happily sat there for a week just to be around you, even if all of them had hated my guts and shown it. Being in your company was, is, and will always be that important to me.” Blue's mouth twitches into a small smile. “Besides, I need the practice. I can only be the solitary college student for so long, right?”

“Ah.” Piper eyes her wryly, but puts her arguments on the back burner because Blue is clearly as stubborn as ever. “Two birds with one stone?”

“Something like that.”

“Mmph.” She collects her mug again and sips the cooling tea. “Well, at any rate, I'm pretty sure you had just about everyone convinced; including me.” The soft chuckle makes her smile. “Did you ever get a... diagnosis or something?” She watches Blue cant her head curiously. “A name for whatever's different about you?”

Blue settles back in her chair with a smile and the low creak of leather, and there's a scuffed, denim-covered knee coming into view when she sets one foot against the edge of her desk. “You know, that's one thing I always really appreciated.”

“What is?”

“You always called it what's 'different about me',” is the answer. “Not what's 'wrong with me'.”

“Blue.” Piper takes care to point her eyes directly into the camera. “There is _nothing_ wrong with you.”

“I know that.” Blue nods at her own lap, and then looks up with a tiny, upwards tug at the corner of her mouth. “Now. And mainly because it was always clear that that's how _you_ felt.” For a long moment those eyes flick between Blue's screen and her camera, and Piper guesses that maybe she really looks as stunned as she feels. “I don't think you really know how much that-- how much _you_ meant to me. Mean to me,” Blue corrects herself, and clears her throat while she curls an arm around her own middle. “There was a long, long while where I trusted what I remembered of your opinions of me much more than my own. Where--” Another soft cough. “-- where the main thing that kept me working was wanting to be the person you'd always seen.”

Piper's eyes are burning too much for her to keep them open. “You know you don't have to change for my sake.”

“I do,” is the quiet reply. “And I learned for my own sake. It just so happened that you were the best inspiration I could have for doing so.”

“Why, though? I--” She's the one who has to clear her throat, now. “You hadn't seen me in _years,_ Blue.”

“Because you've been the cornerstone of my life for as long as I can remember.” The answer is soft, but even. “Whether you were there physically or not. I don't really know how to expl--” Blue stops herself there and tugs at her lower lip again while her gaze shifts off to the side. “Well. Maybe I do, but... I'm gonna have to let someone else do the talking.”

Piper finds a chuckle; mostly because the atmosphere feels thick with a thousand things and she dearly wants to lighten it. “You're not going to refer me to your therapist, are you?”

“No,” Blue snorts. “I just-- emotions aren't something I'm very good at. Explaining why I feel a certain way or why something matters to me, y'know?” That, Piper figures, is probably true; if only because those eyes are now flicking from one thing to the next while Blue's fingers clench and unclench around each other. “So the best way I've found to do that is find a song that sort of works and let that do the talking, but...” She takes a breath and lets it out; long and slow. “It still kinda freaks me out sometimes when things get intense, so I'll, um-- I'll send you the one I'm thinking of if you want, but--” A hard swallow. “I'm gonna be wigging too hard to stay online for it.”

She turns that over in her mind and watches her best friend carefully. “You sure you wouldn't rather skip that?” she wonders softly. “No offense, Blue, but you look about ready to leap from your own skin.”

“I feel like it, too,” is the wry answer, alongside a small smile. “But no. I-- you deserve to know. Y'know? Just-- tell me if it's too much. I get that sometimes I cling a little too hard.”

Blue looks like she's only barely keeping a hold of herself, so Piper doesn't argue and instead simply nods. “Okay,” she assents gently. “Send it over, then. I'll see you next time?”

“Yeah.” The smile is weak, but there, and there's the soft sound of an offered file transfer. “I'll see you next time. G'night, Piper.”

The call ends, and Piper is left staring at the chat window; her tea in her hand and her mind chasing itself in whirling little circles while she clicks the file and waits for it to download. Whatever the hell it is that Blue wants to say with this – _CelineDion06.mp3_ \- it's clearly something that leaves her feeling very exposed.

Piper kind of gets it when the transfer completes and she starts the song playing. The chorus, however, is what really hits hard.

_You were my strength when I was weak  
_ _You were my voice when I couldn't speak  
_ _You were my eyes when I couldn't see  
_ _You saw the best there was in me  
_ _Lifted me up when I couldn't reach  
_ _You gave me faith 'cause you believed  
_ _I'm everything I am  
_ _Because you loved me_

“Jesus.” Piper blows out a shaky breath and wipes at her eyes until her vision is clear enough that she can glower at the screen and the yellow icon next to Blue's name. “You big chicken,” she accuses softly, and shakes her head even as she clicks into the text entry box and starts typing.

_You owe me one hell of a hug when we next see each other IRL, you punk. Try not to run from me like this again, alright? It's not too much; I promise. You mean a whole hell of a lot to me, too, in case you hadn't figured that out.  
_ _Sleep tight, surfer girl. I'll see you in a few days._

 


End file.
